I Need You to Love Me
by Romantic Fool
Summary: Completed! Hermione has a huge secret: She cuts herself when she is stressed. Draco Malfoy accidentally catches her red-handed, and now he must choose either help her or ignore her. A depressing Draco/Hermione (D/Hr) fic with a Happy Ending!
1. Ne me laissez pas Don't lea...

I Need You to Love Me * Dear readers, this is the first time I have tried to write a fanfiction piece. I am a devout fan of Harry Potter who truly wishes that Hermione and Draco would get together and fall in love. However, the chances that it would actually happen in the novel are slim, so I decided to write this story on my own. I warn you, this story is going to get VERY mushy, so bear with me. Please review.*  
  
Chapter 1: Just Anyone  
  
Hermione stared at the blood dripping from her wrist. She felt suddenly queasy as she realized what she had just done. The hand holding the razor blade shook as she felt the pain on her wrist. She let the blade fall. For a strange reason, she felt better. She had been overwhelmed with uncontrollable sobs for over an hour and at this moment, they were gone. The pain that had been choking inside her seemed to be taken away. The only pain she felt was the stinging feeling on her wrist, and she could handle that. She stared numbly at the blood, feeling absolutely nothing for perhaps the first time in her entire life.  
  
"What the heck..Oh God, what happened Granger?"  
  
Hermione blinked. There shouldn't be anyone here. She had very carefully chosen to go to a remote and hidden corner in Hogwarts the moment that she felt the tears welling up in her eyes. Maybe her ears were fooling her.  
  
"Snap out of it Granger. Damn it, you're bleeding! Granger, do you hear me?"  
  
If her ears were fooling her, they were doing a pretty good job.  
  
"Granger, I mean it. Either you talk, or I'm going to go get a teacher RIGHT NOW!"  
  
With those words, Draco saw Hermione's vacant eyes focus. Slowly, she acknowledged his presence , and when she did, her brows snapped together.  
  
"Malfoy?"  
  
Her voice sounded weak even to her own ears. It also sounded calm, collected, and void. She wasn't crying anymore.  
  
"That's it Granger. Now, let's get out of here and visit Madam Pomfrey. She'll fix your wrist up in no time. Then we.."  
  
"No!" Hermione almost shouted.  
  
"Ofcourse she'll fix it up, its only a cut"  
  
"No!!!! Go away Malfoy, this has nothing to do with you. I'm FINE"  
  
Draco could sense the panic in her voice. What was wrong with her.  
  
"Look, I know you hate me, I damn well hate you Muggle. But you are bleeding bad so I'm damn well going to make sure that you get some help."  
  
"I can take care of myself, Malfoy." Hermione said as she flicked her wand and casted a healing spell. Nothing happened. She heard Malfoy gasp.  
  
"You did this to yourself? Are you insane Mudblood?"  
  
"Of course not, it was an accident." Hermione denied, but her voice lacked strength and she knew it. She saw Draco Malfoy arch an eyebrow as he said in a mocking voice.  
  
" I think you forgot something Ms. 'I have the answer to everything.' The only reason a healing spell won't work is if the injury was made bad the person casting it. This means, that YOU did this to yourself!"  
  
Hermione took a step back, feeling trapped.  
  
"Spill it Granger, or I'm telling a teacher right now"  
  
Hermione bit her lip. She lifted her wand to cast a Memory Charm only to see Draco's wand pointing straight at her.  
  
"Don't even try it Granger."  
  
Draco saw her flinched, and then slowly, he heard her explain.  
  
"Look Malfoy, I wasn't trying to kill myself or anything. I just felt stress and this is how I cope okay? It's called adaptive behavior. Just forget you ever saw me. I'll be fine!"  
  
His brows drew together. For one of the first times in his life, Draco Malfoy had no idea what to do. 


	2. Dechire Torn

Chapter 2: Déchiré  
  
'Stop it' Draco told himself as he walked back towards the Slytherin Dormitory.  
  
'Stop thinking about her. If she says she's fine she's fine'  
  
'Look, she's fine, even if she isn't it has absolutely nothing to do with you. Let Potty Head and Weasel deal with her damn problems.'  
  
* But Potter and Weasly don't even know she has a problem, how are they gonna help her?* Another voice made itself heard.  
  
'If I can find out about it, they damn well will' Draco argued.  
  
*But what if she seriously hurts herself before they do? You saw how deep she cut herself. And you did absolutely nothing. You just left her there. What if she's cutting herself right at this moment?*  
  
'She could bleed herself to death. I don't care. The world could do with one less mudblood.'  
  
But just as he thought those words, Draco stopped in his tracks. The fact was that although he hated Potter, Weasly, and.probably Hermione, he realized that he did not truly want her to die. It didn't matter that she was a mudblood, it wouldn't even matter if she was a complete Muggle. He knew her, and to a certain extent, he respected her diligence and talent. He most certainly did not want her to bleed herself to death!  
  
Draco turned back the way he came and practically ran back to where he last saw Hermione.  
  
The moment Draco Malfoy left her sight, Hermione felt lonelier than she felt before. For some reason, the moment she confessed to Malfoy she felt a great deal better. She had been cutting since her third year. At first, they were just small miniscule cuts that barely penetrated the skin. They kept her awake during the days where she had 9 courses to deal with each day. She didn't think they were serious, and they healed fast. She never had to go to Madame Pomfrey. However, her cuts had gotten deeper in her fourth and fifth years. The articles by Rita Skeeter had affected more than anyone ever knew, and the additional stress had made her cut even further. After Cedric Diggory's death, Harry started to distance himself from his friends, and for reasons unknown to Hermione, Ron seemed to grow very uncomfortable around her. Without her friends, (and their problems), to distract her, Hermione was forced to spend a great deal of time by herself. She counteracted this solitude by taking even more courses and trying even harder at her work. However, people nolonger noticed how hard she worked or how good she was. Everyone assumed that she would work hard, earn top scores, and succeed in everything she did. After awhile, it seemed that she was slave- driving herself simply not to break their illusion, not to let them know that really, she wasn't that good at all. She didn't have talent, she knew as little about the wizarding world as anyone possible could, and she was absolutely certain that at some point, her façade would be broken and she would be found out to be the fake that she is. She cut herself deeper, relishing in the pain that it brought her. When her wrist was burning up, she no longer remembered that she was a fake. She no longer remembered that no one loved her, that no one even liked her, that no one wanted to be her friend. She no longer remembered that she didn't belong at Hogwarts at all. Little things started to make her cut. The fact that she couldn't find her notes, the fact that she broke her quill, or even the fact that she got 99% on a test rather than a hundred. Now her wrist was lined with scars that she couldn't heal. When Malfoy found her out, she secretly wished that he would help her. She didn't know how, but she knew that she was ill. Despite that, she told him to go away. She told him that she was fine. But she wasn't. She was far from it. But he was the last person she wanted to think that she needed help.  
  
Hermione felt that urge again. She bent down and picked up the razor from the floor. She pressed it against her flesh, closed her eyses, ready to savor the pain,  
  
"Expelliarmus"  
  
Hermione felt the razor being blown out of her hand.  
  
"Damn it Granger! Can't you be left alone for 10 minutes without causing a blood bath.?"  
  
Hermione's eyes popped open. Lone and behold, Draco Malfoy was staring at her, wand in one hand and the razor in another.  
  
"I thought I told you that this was none of your business  
  
Draco ignored her. He pointed his wand at her arm and said  
  
"Rejoindrius"  
  
Her last wound healed itself, but it left a scar. It didn't matter, her wrist was full of scars anyway. Hermione blinked at Draco Malfoy. Why was he helping her?  
  
As if her could read her mind, Draco answered  
  
"Although I believe Mudbloods should not be taught magic, I have no intention of having your death on my conscience."  
  
"There would be no death Mafoy, and even if there was, I trust that you would be able to clear your conscience in a matter of minutes." Hermione barked. She hated feeling weak, and she especially hated feeling weak in front of someone she considered to be her enemy.  
  
"Your latter statement may be true Granger, but I doubt the first one is. It is clear that you simply cannot be left alone without causing serious harm to yourself."  
  
Draco observed Hermione through narrowed eyes. She looked like a trapped rabbit, ready to run or have a heart-attack and die at the slightest provocation. He decided to aim for calming her down. Then, he would work on taking her to see a teacher. Any teacher.  
  
"Look Granger, I'm not going to hurt you. In fact, I am doing the exact opposite. I am protecting you." He flinched at the absurdity of the situation. Before this, part of his goal in life was to be able to hex Hermione or her friends or get them expelled.  
  
"I don't NEED you to protect me Malfoy. I can take care of myself." Hermione bit out.  
  
"Bullshit. You're digging your own grave and you know it!"  
  
Hermione could have done anything else. She could have cursed him, hexed him, punched him in the face, or run away. Draco would have been ready to handle any of the aforementioned reactions. He would have welcomed them However, Hermione chose this moment to break into heart wrenching sobs."  
  
"Damn it..sob.Malfoy. Why.sob.couldn't you .just .sob.stay away. I could.sob.have taken.sob.care.." Hermione continued, but she became less coherent with each sob she made. Tears were streaming down her face, and her body was shaking uncontrollably. She would have fell down to the ground, but Draco caught her in his arms.  
  
Draco didn't know what to do. He had seen girls cry before, (usually because of his own doings.), but those other times, he didn't give a damn. He had always thought that tears were simply the means to an end. Whenever his mother wanted to buy something new, wanted to do something his father didn't approve of, she cried. When Pansy Parkinson wanted him to introduce her to his parents, she cried. In fact, Draco had thought himself immune to tears. But this Mudblood, his enemy, this girl's tears, had turned his brain to mush. He stood their as still as a statue, holding Hermione in his arms, as she cried onto his shoulder.  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me.  
  
Thanks every one who reviewed my work. I really do appreciate it. I promise that the mushy part of the story would come soon, but I just don't believe it will be realistic have the two just fall in love in the second chapter. Please send me suggestions as to how you want the story to proceed. (It gives me ideas) Thanks again for reading this.  
  
p.s. I apologize for any grammatical errors that are in this story, as well as the inaccurate spells. 


	3. Quel Dommage A shame

By the way, thanks A LOT for the reviews. I don't believe this many people has ever said this many nice things about my work. So the reviews have helped to boost my ego quite a bit. Here's chapter 3, I hope you like it. (By the way, Chapter 3's a bit short, but I posted the next chapter at the same time. The two combined make a long enough read, I hope)  
  
Chapter 3: Il s'inquiète pour moi?  
  
To Draco, it seemed like an eternity before Granger's sobs subsided. His legs actually felt stiff, and so did his arms. He would have to have his robes laundered the next day, he told himself, trying to concentrate on the things he could actually control in his life, which up until these last few moments, he thought was practically everything. However, he was having this awful gut feeling that his world was about to be turned up side down and that his entire life was about to change. He made a very firm mental note not to allow it. He was going to hand Granger over to the first teacher he finds and wash his hands completely off her. He really didn't have time for this.  
  
"Malfoy, can you promise me something?" He heard her ask. He looked down, and saw her huge brown eyes pleading at him. She also looked like she was ready to explode into another tirade if he answered no, and he was ready to say anything just to avoid listening to her cry again.  
  
"Sure" He said, already cursing himself inside for being a fool.  
  
"Can you please not tell anyone about this. Especially not a teacher."  
  
"Damn" This time, he cursed out loud. The heavens were conspiring against him. Why else would he had made a promise before even knowing what he was promising to. At his words, he saw Granger's eyes fill with unshed tears, and he said  
  
"Damn you to hell Granger. I can't handle this. Alright, I won't tell anyone, but you damn well are. I told you, I am not going to have your death on my conscience. I neither have the time, or in fact, the inclination, to help you. So you are going to have to get your help from someone else. I don't care if its Potty Head, Weasle, or Dumbledore, but it is NOT going to be me."  
  
Hermione stared at him. Who on earth did he think he was, her parents? Even her parents never had the audacity to offer to help her. She didn't NEED anyone's help. She didn't even ASK Malfoy for help. She had already told him that her cutting was "adaptive behavior." Stressed people have "adaptive behaviors." Well, most of them adapted by having hot baths or threw pillows, but cutting wasn't that much different. Alright, it was different. But she could handle it.  
  
"Look Malfoy, I'm not asking you to help me. All I'm asking you to do is to not tell anyone. I'll sort this whole thing out eventually. Its just a rough time, with O.W.L.S to do and exams to study for and S.P.E.W to take care off, and Neville to tutor and the future to plan and a brother to worry about and well, everything else to worry about. I'll usually just cut more often during this time of the year, that's all. There's nothing to worry about, that's why I don't want you to make everyone worry about me. THEY have enough to worry about. Can't you just.just.shut your big.. I mean keep quiet about it. " She saw Draco's eyebrow arch a bit higher. He gave her one of his mocking smiles he was so prone to give to her friends and her and asked.  
  
"Is that all you have to worry about? I really can't see how anyone would be stressed over JUST THAT. I mean, your list was SO short. Did you say that you USUALLY cut, and that you just cut MORE OFTEN during this time of the year? And after all this, I mean I respect you Granger really, you actually had the courage to tell ME that I had nothing to worry about? Granger, ARE YOU DEMENTED?"  
  
Hermione blinked. She would have laughed at his sarcasm if only it wasn't so revealing. The fact was that for the first time in days, she didn't feel like cutting. During the entire time Draco was making his surmon, she actually felt normal, the way she felt in her first couple of years at Hogwarts when her only worry was how to counteract the Slytherin's snide comments and devilish plans. As she contemplated her response, she actually felt good. It was a long time since anyone ever worried about her, ever showed that they cared whether she died or not. This coming form Draco Malfoy didn't dim the effect in the very least.  
  
"Look Granger, lets get back to the dorms. I'll take you to see McGonagall, she'll.."  
  
"No!"  
  
"Didn't you hear a thing I said.."  
  
"No! Look Malfoy, I appreciate this..um..this concern, but I feel a lot better now. I haven't felt this good in days actually.. yes, I'll be just fine now. Umm..Thankyou, I think. I'm going back to the dorm, and Malfoy, if you tell anyone.I'll deny everything and say that it was all a Slytherin plot to discredit me. I apologize for threatening you. By the way, you already promised me not to tell. Bye."  
  
And before Draco could respond, Hermione left. Draco could hardly believe that she had actually threatened him. Strangely, he actually felt a little hurt that she had thought that she needed to resort to threatening. He wouldn't have told anyway, he already promised. Well, actually, that's not entirely accurate. There was this small possibility that he would have told, just to get her off his conscience. Well, honestly, the possibility wasn't exactly small, but she should have trusted him anyway. Draco made his way back to the Slytherin dorm. What did she mean when she said "this concern." He was most certainly not "concerned" about her. Why would he be "concerned" about a Mudblood friend of Harry Potter. He was never "concerned" about anything. At that moment, Draco decided that he would sneak into the girl side of the Slytherin dorm to have a little chat with Pansy Parkinson. If he could have a good time with her, that would prove beyond a reasonable doubt that he wasn't "concerned" about Granger. Yes, he would wipe Granger completely out of his mind. Draco chuckled as he remembered Hermione apologize for threatening him.  
  
  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me.  
  
Please go on to read Chapter 4. The next chapter is more juicy than this one (I hope). This is more like a linking chapter.  
  
p.s. I apologize for the fact that I had to alter the characters of Draco and Hermione slightly. The only way I could appease my consciences over matching Hermione with Draco is by making Draco a slightly better person than he seemed to be in the the actual novel. Oh, and rest assured, I am not going to let Draco leave Hermione alone and allow her to die. It's going to take him sometime to accept her as his responsibility, but he eventually will. 


	4. Il s'inquiete pour moi? He'...

Enjoy the constant flow of chapters while you can. Its going to stop the moment my exams starts. Today's a holiday and that's why I've been writing these chapters so close to each other. (It's an excuse not to study, you see.) I'll try to squeeze a couple of more chapters in before forcing myself to study for Physics. (If another chapter pops up after this one, please review it and then TELL me to go and study for Physics. I can't help it, Hermione and Draco are so much more interesting than ray diagrams.)  
  
Chapter 4: Quel dommage  
  
Hermione's mood had improved a great deal by the time she reached the portrait of the Fat Lady. She said the password brightly and stepped inside. She saw Harry and Ron sitting on one of the sofas, gathered her books, and went to sit near them. She couldn't help notice tat they weren't studying for the Potions exam that was on the next day, but were instead, playing wizard's chess.  
  
"Don't even say it Hermione" Ron said as he moved his rook to kill Harry's queen.  
  
"Yes Hermione, just shut your trap." Harry said as he whisked his king out of harm's way.  
  
Hermione's good mood disappeared. They didn't want her here. They didn't want her to sit with them, they didn't WANT her.  
  
"Fine, you guys would have made terrible study partners any way. And Ron, if you don't move you castle, Harry's going to check your king in three more moves. I'll leave you to your game." Hermione said, picked up her books again, and ran to her dormitory.  
  
Both Harry and Ron blinked. Harry said  
  
"Is she mad? We were a bit mean. It thought she was going to lecture us into studying for potions."  
  
"Naa. She has mood swings lately. I think its PMS. Hermione's fine, we don't need to worry about her." Ron answered as he moved his castle to prevent Harry's attack.  
  
"Maybe I'll ask her to play with me next time. Actually, forget that. She's going to win anyway.  
  
(I think you guys could all guess what Hermione did in her dormitory right?)  
  
Draco Malfoy walked groggily into Potions. He HAD spent the entire night with Pansy Parkinson. She though he enjoyed it. In fact, he actually tried VERY hard to enjoy it. However, for some reason, whenever Pansy said anything remotely stupid (which was extremely often), Draco's mind went to Hermione and he started to worry. NO, he DID NOT and WAS NOT worried about that Mudblood. He just couldn't have feeling that he could have done something more. Then, at 5 in the morning, he woke up after having a nightmare about him finding Hermione dead. It wasn't because he was "Concerned" about her. HE just wasn't used to seeing people cutting themselves up that's all. Somehow, just thinking about her, made him get up and study for Potions. Now, he was walking into the Potions exam, and all he could think about was finding her. He saw her sitting in front of the room, her book open, looking extremely prepared. However, she was wearing a queer-looking, extremely large bracelet on her left hand.  
  
Hermione was prepared for the exam. After a few sessions of her "adaptive behavior," she actually felt calm enough to study. Despite the fact that she had learnt her book by heart since the summer break, and the fact that she had been studying for it for the past month, and the fact that even if she got a 0 on the exam, she would still have an 80% for her semester grade (the exam is worth 20% and Hermione had gotten full scores on all her Potions assignments), Hermione had read the book over 2 more times, redid all the comprehension questions, made up and new and improved study guide. And then she went to sleep.  
  
Her only worry was that someone would notice the marks on her wrist. That was why she had fashioned a couple of ribbons into a bracelet and tied it over the marks. Ginny actually thought that she was making a fashion statement. Hermione thought that it was attracting more attention to her arm than it should, especially from Draco Malfoy.  
  
Halfway through his exam, Draco looked up to see Hermione already done. It seemed that she was rereading her exam, checking for possible mistakes. She saw her reach the end of her parchment and unroll it again at the top. Draco couldn't help smiling, she was indeed a worry wart. She didn't need a good grade anyway. She was already going to get a B, and in Potions, that was considered extremely high. Draco returned to his exam and finished it. For the first time in his entire academic career, Draco opted to go through his answers, checking for possible mistakes.  
  
He found 5 of them the first time through. He looked up, and saw that Hermione was still there, checking her answers for possibly the 100th time. Draco checked his answers again, finding 2 more mistakes. He was about to turn his paper in when he saw that Hermione still there, checking her answers for the 200th time. For a strange reason, Draco checked his answers again, finding one more mistake. Suddenly, reality hit him. He was being influenced by a MUDBLOOD! And it wasn't just any mudblood, it was Hermione Granger! Draco swore under his breath, refusing to continue to check his work after seeing Hermione, still there, checking her answers for the 300th time, and turned his paper in.  
  
*** "Ms. Granger, I believe that you have checked your answers extremely thoroughly. You may feel free to hand you paper in, considering that you are the last person still in this room."  
  
Hermione, looked up, and handed her paper to Snape. She hadn't found any mistakes at all. May be she wasn't being thorough enough. She really wanted to check her paper again. However, time was up. Hermione gathered her books, deciding to go to the library to study for the Arithmancy exam.  
  
One couldn't really study for Arithmancy, it was more application than content. However, it wouldn't hurt to go through a few more practice exams. As she reached the library, a hand reached out to pull her into a room she had never been in before. It was a nice room actually, with all its walls covered by books and a comfy looking sofa in center of the room, and beautiful mahogany Desk complete with an expensive stationary set. She wasn't at all shocked to find that the hand holding her arm was Draco Malfoy's.  
  
Draco, however, was not very appreciative of his surroundings. He yanked at the bunch of ribbons covering Granger's wrist only to find exactly what he expected, a layer of red, nasty looking scars. He saw Granger's face pale with shock, grow pink with embarrassment, and then redden with anger.  
  
"What right, Malfoy, had you to do that? What I do with my wrist is my private business." Hermione fumed. Alright, he did sort off had a right, since she told him very explicitly that she was fine the night before. However, he was making a bigger deal out of the whole situation than he needed to.  
  
"Are you, or are you not, going to tell a teacher, Potty Head, or Weasle about what you're doing to your wrist Granger?" Draco hissed. For some reason, He was extremely angry at Hermione. He was also angry at himself for letting her leave the night before. He could have stopped her from hurting herself, but he didn't, he just let her continue. And now, he was staring at her blood covered wrist without any idea of how to continue.  
  
"No, I am not going to tell ANYONE about this. Neither, Malfoy, are you. I can handle it. I'm FINE. Now, I need to go a study for Arithmancy." Hermione bit back. He had put her on the defensive, and she didn't feel good about it. She didn't like anyone having this sort of power over her. Actually, it wasn't that bad. It made her feel much less alone. But still, she was certain that she could take care of herself. Alright, she was certain that she could take care of herself most of the time. But the times that she couldn't were few and far between. Well, they weren't few.Oh drat it.  
  
"How Granger, are you going to stop me from doing something about it?" Draco asked, a vague idea forming in his head. He wasn't really sure what the idea was, but he let his instincts guide him. His brain was offering no answers to him at the moment, and that, was an extremely rare occurrence.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me.  
  
Umm.. please review, and if you see a Chapter 5 posted, please include "You need to study for Physics right now" in your review. If you see a Chapter 6.well.if there is one..oh dear. Well, I hope you liked this chapter. I think its sort of boring and uneventful, but the events should be included in the next chapter that should NOT be posted anytime soon, but I sort of liked this chapter though. Thanks for reading and for all your reviews. 


	5. J'ai besoin de toi I need y...

Oh dear. I told myself not to write this. I begged myself not to write this. But I'm as curious about how the story's gonna turn out as you guys are. So, one more Chapter wouldn't hurt. Then I WILL study for physics. Thanks for the past reviews.  
  
Chapter 4: J'ai besoin de toi (I'm not sure who's saying this)  
  
"I don't NEED to stop you. You.you promised!" Hermione said. However, she was getting a little worried. Well, she was getting VERY worried. When could anyone ever count on a promise made by a Slytherin? The answer was simple, no oen ever could. Well, no one actually ever counted on one. However, Draco could be counted on right? He wasn't the sort to break his promises right? He wouldn't break them even if it would hurt his most hated enemy right? Oh dear! He WOULD!!!!  
  
"Since when did you ever think you could count on my promises Granger?" Draco asked. Actually, he was pretty certain at this moment that he would keep his promise. In fact, he never actually ever directly intentionally broke his promises. He always found ways to get around them and have the exact same detrimental affect. However, for a strange reason, he was pretty sure that he wasn't going to get around them with Granger. Well, he might try, if he had to, but he wouldn't. No, probably not. Possibly not. But she didn't have to know that did she?  
  
"Since .well, you WOULDN'T! Would you?"  
  
Draco just quirked his eyebrows. And said  
  
"Wouldn't you want to make sure?"  
  
Hermione squirmed. That's right, she actually squirmed. She felt like a trapped rabbit who was very certain that she was at the hunter's mercy. For some reason, being at someone else's mercy felt better than being at her own mercy. However, this was not just somebody else, this was Draco Malfoy, so it wouldn't be better. Or would it?  
  
"Are you Blackmailing me Malfoy?" it was a rhetorical question  
  
"Yes, Granger, I most certainly am."  
  
*** Hermione spent the rest of her day tutoring Malfoy in Arithmancy. She didn't really understand why he bothered to take Arithmancy in the first place. He didn't seem to grasp any of the concepts and he didn't seem to like the subject at all. She though Arithmancy was the most fun subject, but she as yet has never found anyone who agreed with her.  
  
"Malfoy, you can't Multiply those to matrices. It just isn't possible"  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"They aren't in the same order"  
  
"The ones you multiplied before weren't in the same order"  
  
"Well, there's this pattern you see. The end number of the order of the first one must be the same as the beginning number of the second one. Or else, their determinant .."  
  
"WHAT?"  
  
On and on it went. For some reason, it wasn't really boring teaching Malfoy. Although it took him time to grasp the concepts, when he did, he didn't need further instruction. And each time he looked up at her gratefully, Hermione felt a sense of accomplishment that she had never felt before. Besides, at least she wasn't alone and someone seemed to acknowledge her abilities.  
  
Draco was also having one of the best study sessions in his life. He had always detested Arithmancy and only took it because the position in the Ministry that his father wanted him to take required it. Professor Vector wasn't the greatest of teachers either. He was smart and all that, but he was never really affective in transferring his knowledge to his students. If one knew how to ask the right questions, which Hermione always did, one could get the him to be perform to the best of his abilities. However, since the rest of the world did not memorize their textbooks by heart during the summer, it was impossible to know what questions to ask. With Hermione, Draco was actually beginning to like Arithmancy. Oh shit, NO ONE normal liked Arithmancy!  
  
*** 5 hours later  
  
"Can you let me be now that I have practically made sure that you will pass Arithmancy?" Hermione asked.  
  
She was actually regretting that the study session was coming to a close. That meant that she would have to go back to the Gryffindor dormitory again. She didn't really want to be alone, but she seemd to always be alone. And whenever she felt lonely, she seemed to become depressed, and when she became depressed, oh well.  
  
"Umm No."  
  
Hermione blinked. (She's been doing a lot of this lately hasn't she. Please feel free to suggest to me how else she could react when she's caught by surprise. For now, she will continue to blink.) What did he mean by 'No?' They had both stopped in their tracks and she was staring, mouth open, towards him.  
  
"Come on Granger, you didn't think I would let you off the hook after only 5 hours of tutoring did you?" He asked, trying to look as innocent as possible but resulted in looking extremely devilish (and handsome). Hermione, acknowledged this, but thought better not to act on it.  
  
"Well, umm.yes. It was five hours." Hermione said weakly. Already beginning to regret the day she first cut herself. (Yes!) Draco started walking again, with Hermione trying to catch up with him.  
  
"Hey, Malfoy, where are we going?" Hermione managed to ask, already panting as she tried to keep up with his long strides.  
  
"To see Dumbledore." Draco answered monotonously.  
  
Hermione stopped in her tracks. Draco sighed and turned towards her.  
  
" Trust me, I am not going to spill your little secret. I just have a few favors to ask from him."  
  
"What favors?"  
  
" That, Granger, is for me to know, and for you to find out.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me.  
  
Ain't I evil, ending at this very moment. Well, don't worry, I have another chapter up my sleave. (The next one IS going to be my last one for a while. I do need to study. But I also want to know what's going to happen next. ) Please read and review. 


	6. Un faux pas A mistake

I promise the romance will come eventually. Keep your fingers crossed.  
  
Chapter 6: Un faux pas  
  
"Are you absolutely certain, Mr. Malfoy that this is what you want? I remember you protesting very vehemently against it at the beginning of the year and that was why we made an exception for you." Professor Dumbledore asked, peering over his spectacles. There was something very fishy about this. "And you Ms. Granger, you want this arrangement as well?"  
  
"Certainly Professor. Granger, I mean Hermione (He said her name!) and I, are both prefects and you have already made it known that next year we will be Head Boy and Head Girl. Since we are going to have many common obligations and activities, it would be more convenient if we shared a suite. Granger, I mean Hermione, and I have resolved our differences and have decided that cohabitating will not be a problem at all. Don't you agree Granger? I mean Hermione?" Draco said in his most sincere voice. Then he turned to glare at Granger, his eyes giving her a silent warning to agree with whatever he said.  
  
Hermione looked like a confused rabbit. She was VERY confused at the moment. Why on earth would Draco Malfoy want to share a suite with her? They had both protested vehemently against the sharing the Prefects' suite at the beginning of the year. Draco elbowed her lightly, reminding her that she didn't really have a choice so she, VERY SLOWLY, nodded.  
  
Dumbledore was very confused to. However, being the great wizard that he was, he knew that no harm would come if they did share a suite. Against all his powers of logic, his instincts were telling him to agree. Like any good wizard, Dumbledore had great trust in his instincts, so he replied:  
  
"Well then, I see no reason to refuse. I assume then, that you wish to maintain these living arrangements during the summer break, since Mr. Lucious Malfoy has just informed me that he wished you, Draco, to remain at Hogwarts this year for safety's sake?"  
  
"Yes" [Draco] "No" [Hermione]  
  
Draco glared at Hermione. Hermione squirmed.  
  
"Granger, I mean Hermione, means yes, don't you Granger?" Draco lifted an eyebrow inquiringly.  
  
With great difficulty, Hermione forced herself to nod in assent.  
  
***  
  
"Draco Malfoy, come back here and explain yourself." Hermione screeched the moment the exited Dumbledore's room.  
  
Draco burst into laughter. He clutched his belly, his face red, and started pounding on the wall.  
  
"WHAT his so funny? You better have a VERY good explanation about why you want me to spend the rest of the year, the entirety of my summer break, and the rest of my last year at Hogwarts in the same rooms as you." Hermione had gone very red. Whatever she had expected him to do, cohabitating was certainly not one of them.  
  
Draco guffawed, unable to contain his mirth.  
  
"You..laugh..you should have seen your face in that room Granger. You looked very much like a rabbit that was having a heart attack. And jjjjusst now ..laugh.you sounded exactly like my nanny. laugh "  
  
"Answer my question for crying out loud. Why would you want ME in the same room with YOU." Hermione was unconsciously stomping her foot on the floor, hyperventilating, and looking very furious that Draco succumbed to another bout of laughter.  
  
When he finally, stopped, he said.  
  
"Well, part of me just did that to piss you off. Besides, sharing the same suite would mean having access to a full-time tutor, as well as a full-time punch bag. Besides, I heard the private suites at Hogwarts are top class and full of secrets. I thought it would be interesting" Draco lied.  
  
He knew that he couldn't let Hermione out of his sight. He would keep worrying about her, wandering about her...Draco stopped. Ofcourse, he wouldn't 'worry' about the Mud.damn it, he could even think the word anymore. What the heck was wrong with him? And was he actually thinking of her as 'Hermione?' This wasn't good. This wasn't good at all. She was GRANGER and not Hermione. He was NOT worried about her. She WAS a goddamn mud..  
  
"arghhhh" Draco groaned.  
  
Hermione blinked, rather baffled by his roller-coaster moods. Did guys have PMS too?  
  
"Umm.Malfoy?" She asked, not really knowing what about,  
  
Draco glared at her. This time there as actually malice in his countenance.  
  
"Don't even think, Mudblood, that I give a damn about you. I did NOT suggest new living arrangements because I CARED about you. I do NOT even want to acknowledge your existence. I am, however, in need of help with Arithmancy and Herbology, and god knows what other subjects and I need to do very well on the O.W.L.S and N.E.W.T.S this year if I even want to cater hopes for the position my father has in stall for me. When we are together, you are going to make yourself as scarce as possible. Do you understand me Granger?"  
  
Somehow, Hermione felt very hurt. Of course she didn't think that he cared about her. It would have been nice if he did, but if he didn't, well, it wouldn't affect her. It didn't even matter if he didn't want her to exist. How would that be different? NO ONE wanted her to exist. No one cared about her. Her parents didn't want her to go back home during the holidays. Her friends avoided her. So this was not different. THIS WAS NO DIFFERENT AT ALL!  
  
Hermione felt herself succumbing to that urge again. That damnable urge to grab for a razor blade. She felt tears welling up in her eyes followed by the familiar shaking of her body. She forgot everything. She HAD to get away, she had to go somewhere where she was alone.  
  
Draco regretted his words the moment he saw Hermione's face loose colour. He regretted them even more as he saw tears well up in her eyes, as he saw her run away. He stood there, stupefied for a few moments, and then he realized what he had just done.  
  
Disclaimer: these characters do not belong to me, they belong to J.K. Rowling. I just own the plot.  
  
Got to cut this short, need to study for physics, so bye. Please read and review 


	7. Ou est elle? Where is sh...

Upon Cyropi's and lil-spitfire's request, I'm going to translate the chapter names from now own. Here are the translations for Chapters 2-6:  
  
Déchiré = Torn Il s'inquiète pour moi? = He's worried about me? Quel dommage = what a shame J'ai besoin de toi = I need you Un faux pas = a must not (a mistake)  
  
I know some of the names don't really make sense, but I need to justify spending this much time on a non school activity by practicing my French. Btw, Thanks loads for all the reviews. I'll try to keep the story going.  
  
Chapter 7: Où est-elle? (Where is she?)  
  
"What are you doing here Malfoy? And how on earth did you get in?" Harry asked. (Harry actually had a very good reason to be surprised and slightly angry, since Draco Malfoy was sitting in the Gryffindor common room)  
  
Draco shrugged. He was exhausted and this was his last hope of finding Hermione.umm Granger. He had scanned the dungeons, searched the hidden room, actually looked through the Forbidden Forest and there was no sign of her. He had really truly hoped to find her back safely sleeping in her dormitory, but he didn't. He really wasn't in the mood to deal with Potty Head, but he didn't seem to have a choice.  
  
"Answer my question Malfoy, or I am going to get Mcgonagall (?) to take you out by your ears this very instant!" Harry continued. For some reason, he had a feeling that Malfoy wouldn't have risked being punished without good reason.  
  
"My family donated the portrait that guards your door, so she does what I tell her to. I am here, Potter, to find Granger" Draco answered as he lifted his feet to rest on the Gryffindor table, which was full of Harry's books and notes. His boots were muddy from his search, so he wasn't surprised when he noticed that Potter didn't seem very happy.  
  
"Take those feet off my books Malfoy" Harry growled as he moved to push them off himself. He noticed Malfoy's eyebrows arch, and for a strange reason, Malfoy did not resist Harry's efforts. After making sure that his books were safely tucked away from Malfoy's grasp (or feet), Harry asked  
  
"What business do you have with Hermione?"  
  
"She was supposed to move into the Prefects' suite 2 hours ago. I happen to need help with Ancient Runes and I was not very happy when I found out that she wasn't there. That is why I have resolved to take her there, RIGHT NOW."  
  
Harry felt rather dubious about Malfoy's intentions. He had never known Malfoy to CARE about his studies. He had actually never seen Malfoy CARE about anything, especially NOT Ancient Runes. Consequently, breaking into the Gryffindor common room simply because he needed Hermione to tutor him was not characteristic of him at all. By the way, did he say that Hermione was supposed to move into the Prefect's suite with HIM?  
  
"Refrain from leaving you mouth agape, Potter, it makes you look like a confused fish and can be considered as eye pollution. Do you know where Granger is or not?" Draco asked, exuding a calm that he did not have. If he wasn't desperate, he wouldn't have broken in to the Gryffindor common room and he wouldn't have asked Potty Head for help. As every moment ticked by, Hermi..Granger's danger was increasing, and he sure as hell did not want her death on his conscience.  
  
"No, no one has seen her for hours. Not that I WOULD tell you where she was if I knew." Harry answered and let his mouth fall open again (like a confused fish) as Malfoy cursed, kicked over the table, and left the common room.  
  
***  
  
"Draco darling, can you please stop pacing, you're giving me a headache." Pansy Parkinson said from her bed as Draco paced in front over her. She had NEVER seen Draco pace before and she was a bit bewildered.  
  
Draco stopped, he wasn't aware that he was pacing. Why would it matter if he hadn't found Herm..Granger? Why should he care what happened to her? She had only disappeared for FIVE hours! What the hell could happen in FIVE hours? The answer to that question was too ominous to think about. Why was he with Pansy Parkinson anyway?  
  
"Draco, are you sure you're not going home this summer? I would love to be introduced to your parents."  
  
Introduced to his parents? Why would he want to introduce Pansy Parkinson to his parents? It wasn't HIS fault she fancied herself his girlfriend. Well, he did take her to the dance and all, but surely she understood that he would NEVER marry his mother's clone. If he were to marry, it would be to someone intelligent, compassionate, understanding, and courageous, just like...Where the Fxxx was Hermione?  
  
***  
  
Hermione felt dazed. She also felt too weak to stand, to move, or to do practically anything. She had cut herself up pretty bad this time, and as she gazed at the blood that was now flooding the bathroom floor, she dimly realized that she should be calling for help. However, she felt too tired to scream, and she didn't really think it mattered anyway. No one cared about her, all she was was a walking talking encyclopedia with no other purpose in life whatsoever. Draco Malfoy's word had just proven it. So why should she bother calling for help? Besides, shouldn't people be looking for her right now? Perhaps not, nobody would care enough about her to waste the time to do so. Nobody would even worry about her. Somehow, she felt her brain screaming at her, telling her that she was a hen-wit and that she didn't really want to die. Ofcourse she didn't want to die, she just needed to focus the pain onto her wrist rather than let it hang there and distract her. She vaguely remembered that she had an Arithmancy exam the next day. She should get up. But she needed a nap first. That's right, just a short little nap, then she would get up and study.  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me.  
  
I am evil, I am mean, what happens next? Cummon, you guys don't really think I'm gonna let Hermione die NOW would you? I just need time to figure out how Draco is going to save her. (what if he doesn't !??) Please read and review. 


	8. l'aide d'une fantome the ...

Chapter 8: L'aide d'un(e) fantôme - the help of a ghost.  
  
Moaning Myrtle felt torn. There she was, a girl who could possible become her friend for the rest of eternity. She would love to have someone to talk to everyday, someone who would share the bathroom with her, someone who would listen to her moaning. But this girl had been so NICE to her. She had always prevented her friends from making fun of her. She had always come in to talk once in a while. Certainly she didn't deserve to die?  
  
Myrtle heard the girl moan. She looked feverish. She was very close to dying. Just a few moments more. What was the girl saying?  
  
"Someone..anyone.someone.plss.love.me.."  
  
No one loved her? Well, if no one loved her, it wouldn't matter if she died would it? If she were a ghost, she would be Myrtle's friend. Myrtle would be her friend. She won't be lonely anymore. But some how, it didn't seem right.  
  
"I.don't.want.to ..die. I ..just..need..to.end .the pain. There's..just.so.much..pain."  
  
Well, she didn't want to die. If she didn't want to die, may be Myrtle shouldn't let her die. But if no one loved her?  
  
10 minutes pass..Oh dear, what's going to happen!!! Please Myrtle do something!  
  
Myrtle had an idea. (Thank god!) She would mentally (using her ghostly powers) search Hogwarts for anyone who was thinking about this girl. If any one was giving any indication that he/she loved her, she would tell that person. If not, Myrtle would have a new friend!  
  
Gryffindor Boy's dormitory  
  
Harry: I'm beginning to get worried about Hermione. Where do you think she is? Ron: Oh, she's probably off somewhere quiet to study. No big deal. Harry: But Malfoy was in here just now, and he looked worred. Maybe.. Ron: Oh, Malfoy's probably just playing a prank on you. Trust me, what's the worst thing Hermione can do? Study herself to death? Harry: laughs  
  
Myrtle: No, they certainly don't love her.  
  
Neville Longbottom's room  
  
Neville: Oh dear, I need to ask Hermione these questions about Transfiguration. I hope she comes back soon. Or should I ask someone else  
  
Myrtle: No, definitely not.  
  
Gryffindor Girl's dormitory  
  
Parvati Patil: I absolutely hate Granger. How can she get a 110% for that Potions exam. It just isn't fair. Lavender: Maybe we should find her, take her brains, and share it among all of us. It would make us a great deal smarter. Parvati Patil: laughs.  
  
Myrtle: Hmm.Maybe I should just let her die.  
  
Slytherin Boy's dormitory  
  
Crabbe: Umm, what that's .umm.What was I about to say? Goyle: Uhhh.where is.umm.what was I thinking?  
  
Myrtle: sigh, I am certainly going to get a new friend.  
  
Prefect's suite  
  
Draco Malfoy: Where the Fxxx is she? Why isn't she back yet? No, I am NOT worried about her. I don't give a SXXX about her. It doesn't matter if she drops dead and dies. But where the HELL is she? I don't need this right now. Why isn't she back yet? Dammit, she'd better not be cutting herself or I'll kill her myself. STOP THINKING ABOUT HER!! SHE IS NOTHING TO YOU!! Etc, etc.  
  
Myrtle: yeah, sure, you REALLY don't care about her.  
  
*** (Thankyou Myrtle. Thankyou, Thankyou, Thankyou. Oh dear, I'm talking to my (I mean J.K Rowling's) own characters. This is a sign of insanity!!)  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me.  
  
Umm, sorry this chapter's so short. I just felt that the continuation to it needs to be in a different chapter which should be posted together with this one. Oh, btw, the Gryffindor ppl aren't that mean, they were just joking and if Hermione really dies, they would be very sorry for having said those things. They really do care about her, but Hermione doesn't realize it. 


	9. Mensonge apres Mensonge Li...

Chapter 9: Mensonges après Mensonges (lies after lies)  
  
Draco's mind was reeling at the sight of Hermione on the floor of the Girls Bathroom. He had been running frantically to reach it wince Myrtle appeared to tell him of Hermione's predicament. Now that he had reached the bathroom, seen the state Hermione was in, he had absolutely no idea what to do.  
  
"Why the hell didn't you tell someone faster? She's practically dead now!" He snapped at Myrtle who started to cry indignantly.  
  
Draco approached Hermione's body, heart thumping harder than it ever had before. He reached to feel her pulse, and felt nothing. He started to panic. Was she really dead? This was all his fault! He should never had said those things. His resolve started to shake as he felt his eyes growing hot. He was NOT going to cry over this Mudblood.  
  
"Dooo somesingggg fasssttt. Sheeees nooot deeeaad yeettt. But sheee will beeee sooooooon." Myrtle moaned.  
  
Draco had realized the Hermione was still breathing. He picked her up, hands shaking, and ran out of the bathroom. He headed straight for Madame Pomfrey. He had no idea what he was going to tell her, and he didn't care. All that mattered to him was that Hermione would live. At that moment, he would give ANYTHING just to see her open her eyes again and look at him.  
  
*** (am I getting a bit too Mushy? This is a temporary lapse in control on Draco's part though, it's not permanent. It's just that he has been worried for so long and isn't sure whether or not Hermione will live. )  
  
"Is she going to be alright?" Draco asked Madame Pomfrey in a rather anxious voice.  
  
"She's lost a lot of blood and has cut an essential vein. Besides that, she'll be fine by tomorrow. I have already cast a recuperating spell on her, so she'll heal quickly." Madame Pomfrey turned away from her patient and glared at Draco. "Now, Mr. Malfoy, I want a detailed explanation from you. And don't even think about lying."  
  
The moment Madame Pomfrey told Draco that Hermione..no.Granger was going to be fine, Draco was able to return to his original emotional state. His grey eyes turned cold, his posture straightened, his eyebrows arched, and his mouth quirked into a cynical smile. He leaned back on his chair and replied politely, albeit indifferently.  
  
"There is nothing to explain Madame Pomfrey. It is clear that Granger cut herself accidentally and I happened to find her in the bathroom and bring her here." Draco was rather amazed by the calmness of his voice. He was a wonderful liar wasn't he?  
  
"And what, Mr. Malfoy, may I ask, were you doing in the Girl's bathroom?" Madame Pomfrey inquired with a voice tinged with irony. "And may I further point out, After curfew?"  
  
Good question. Draco blinked (guess who he caught this from) and then blinked again, trying desperately to think up an answer. Finally, he said  
  
"The explanation is very simple. I have decided to conduct a study about ghosts. Today, I decided that I would interview Moaning Myrtle. And, may I further point out Madame Pomfrey, as a Prefect, I can be out of the dorms anytime I want. So could Granger." After stating this, Draco smirked. He knew that Madame Pomfrey wasn't buying his lies, she would be worse than an idiot if she did. However, he also knew that she also had no channel to inquire further. They remained in uncomfortable silence until both of them heard Hermione moan.  
  
"Where..am..I?" Hermione whispered. Her last recollection was of her taking a nap in the Girls bathroom. She vaguely remembered being in the arms of someone strong and lean, but she had absolutely no idea who. She also had absolutely no idea why both Madame Pomfrey and Draco Malfoy were staring her as if they were seeing a ghost. For an instant, Hermione thought she saw relief and joy flood through Draco's eyes but then had to attribute it to poor eye sight, for Draco Malfoy was now glaring at her with barely leashed anger.  
  
"Ms. Granger, I believe an explanation is warranted. Mr. Malfoy FOUND you in the girls bathroom and brought you here. When you arrived, you had suffered massive blood loss and one of your blood veins had been severed. Would you mind telling me how this all came to pass?" Madame Pomfrey asked, her voice scarily sweet.  
  
Hermione stared at Malfoy, searching desperately for a clue of what to say. She saw Malfoy stand up and accidentally knock the chair down to the floor. He brushed himself, picked the chair up, and sat down again, his face devoid of all emotion. Hermione's eyebrows furrowed together, and then suddenly her eyes lighted. She understood him!  
  
"Well Madame Pomfrey, it was an accident, you see. I was trying to shave my errr.eyebrows when I dropped the razor and it accidentally cut my errr.left wrist. It was an accident, honest.."  
  
Madame Pomfrey's eyes rose in mock amazement. She obviously did not believer Hermione. (Who would?) However, she acted along.  
  
"Well Ms. Granger, that was an unfortunate accident. Why, may I be so curious, did you not come immediately to the Hospital Wing and ask for help?  
  
Very good question, Hermione thought. She wasn't good at lying. In fact, she had actually never really lied before. She looked pleadingly at Malfoy who simply quirked his eyebrows at her, as if to say 'Its your mess Granger, figure your way out of it!" Hermione shifted uncomfortably, before answering  
  
"Well, you see professor, ummm I didn't think that the uhhh cut was that serious ummm and I was so engaged in my conversation with ummmm Moaning Myrtle that I ummmm forgot the time uhhhh and then, by the time I realized it, I ummmm was already to weak to move and I ummm fell asleep." Hermione ended weakly and started to stare at her hands.  
  
"Well, then, Mr. Malfoy, please feel free to escort Ms. Granger back to your suite. You are aware, Ms. Granger, that I will have to report this incident to Professor Dumbledore?" Madame Pomfrey asked, trying to meet Hermione's gaze but failed.  
  
It was Malfoy, who answered.  
  
"Please do not concern Professor Dumbledore with this triviality, Madame Pomfrey. Since Granger and I share common living arrangements, I will take responsibility for her future actions. Let me assure you" he glared menacingly at Hermione "that incident will NEVER repeat itself."  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me.  
  
  
  
Oh, I can't wait to learn about what happens next. Constructive criticism is much appreciated, I am sort off running out of ideas. I hope you liked the story up until now. I promise that it will get more romantic in the following chapters (I'm not that good with love scenes). Please read and review. 


	10. Ma chambre n'est pas ton chambre ...

Wow, I've never had this many reviews in my life! (This probably has something to do with me never showing my work to anyone.) Anyway, thanks loads. Here's the next chapter.I was suffering a bit of a writer's block when I was writing this though, so I apologize if it doesn't turn out to be that good. Please read and review.  
  
Chapter 10: Mon chambre n'est pas ton chambre! (My room is not your room!)  
  
Hermione cringed when Draco slammed the door of their suite shut. She had noticed that her belongings were already there in the suite. She assumed that the House Elves had brought them there and made a mental note to go and thank them. She didn't have time to appreciate the beauty of the room (Actually, it's just that this author's not good with describing rooms), for Draco Malfoy was now advancing towards her, his face flushed, and she could truly picture steam shooting out of his ears. She had no idea why he was so angry.  
  
"What were you playing at Granger? Don't tell me you wanted to die just because of those things I said to you." Strangely, Hermione noticed that dread and guilt were interlaced with the anger of his voice. She, very intelligently, ignored it.  
  
"Do not flatter yourself Malfoy. I would never kill myself over something YOU said. Actually, I would never kill myself over something anybody says. And I was NOT trying to kill myself last night." Hermione shot back, but her voice lacked strength. She was smart enough to realize that what she was saying sounded unbelievable, even to her.  
  
"So why did you slit your wrist and lock yourself in the Girls bathroom until you were almost dead?" Draco asked mockingly.  
  
"I..I was stressed. I felt bad. Cutting myself eases the pain." Hermione answered in almost a whisper.  
  
"Bullsxxx!" Draco shouted.  
  
"Its true. Look Malfoy, don't worry. This one was really an accident. I cut myself too deep, that's all. I'll make sure I don't reach a vein next time" Hermione almost bit her tongue over her last sentence, for Draco Malfoy was now less than an inch from her with his hands on her shoulders and was shaking her harshly.  
  
"THERE IS NOT GOING TO BE A NEXT TIME! Do you hear me Hermione? Last night was the LAST TIME you would have the pleasure of cutting yourself. You are NEVER going to do this to me again!" Draco wanted to strangle her. How can she talk so lightly about that fact that she had almost killed herself? If he was only a few minutes late, she would have died. Suddenly, Draco realized what he had just said. Firstly, he had called her "Hermione." She was Granger, not Hermione. It was bad enough that he was calling her Hermione in his head, but now he had just did so out loud. Secondly, he had said "You are never to do this to ME again." How could what she do affect HIM in anyway? Of course not. It didn't affect him. It wouldn't have mattered if she died this instant. Would it?  
  
  
  
Draco stopped himself from answering that question. To his relief, Hermione, no, Granger did not seem to notice either of his slips. She was, however, quite angry.  
  
"Malfoy, you have no right to tell me what I can or can not do with my body. If I want to cut, you are darn well not going to stop me. How do you expect to make sure that I won't cut again anyway? You CAN'T" Hermione shouted.  
  
"Yes, GRANGER, I CAN! From today onwards, you are going to sleep on my floor!"  
  
Hermione blinked. What did he just say? She was going to sleep on his floor?  
  
"Are you delusional Malfoy? Did you just say that you wanted me to sleep on your floor?" Hermione asked, so shocked that her anger had disappeared and so confused that she didn't protest.  
  
Draco's eyebrows quirked mockingly.  
  
"I do not WANT any such thing. It is quite clear that I do not have any choice. It seems that every time you are out of my sight, you cause a blood bath. Did you really expect me to do leave you alone EVER again?"  
  
Hermione's mouth fell open. She was, for the first time in her life, without words.  
  
Noticing her silence, Draco asked her  
  
"Did you expect ME to sleep on YOUR floor? If you did Granger, you are the delusional one. Malfoys do not sleep on floors." He ended, sounding like the arrogant bastard he was.  
  
"I, Malfoy, did not expect anyone to sleep on any floor. And as a matter of fact, NO ONE is!" Hermione said, her voice still shacking with shock Malfoy, however, didn't seem to be listening.  
  
"Please do not expect to make yourself comfortable in my room. You will keep all your belongings in your room, as well as use your own bathroom. However, at night, you will sleep on the floor in my room, and kindly refrain from snoring. I'm a very light sleeper. Oh, you will not be allowed to spend more than 20 minutes in either bathroom, just a precaution. Furthermore, I will take charge of all your razor blades, cutters, and well, scissors from now on. If you need them, you will need to ask my permission and."  
  
"I am NOT going to sleep on YOUR FLOOR." Hermione burst out.  
  
"Yes, Granger, you are. Also, from now on, please understand that arguing with me is futile."  
  
"I am NOT going to sleep on YOUR FLOOR. I am not even going to go ANYWHERE near your ROOM." Hermione screamed.  
  
Draco massaged his ears before continuing.  
  
"My room is MY ROOM. It is NOT your room. Always keep that in mind. Please make sure that you do not touch anything in my room, besides the floor of course. Oh, you may never borrow any of my toiletries, especially my razor. And lastly, when I go to sleep, all the lights go off. You may not study while I sleep, I do not want to be disturbed. Ever."  
  
"Malfoy, are you DEAF. Didn't you hear me? I AM NOT GOING TO SLEEP ON YOUR FLOOR."  
  
"If you do not follow these guidelines strictly, I shall be forced to go straight to Professor Dumbledore and report your little 'adaptive behavior.' Is there anything you wish to say Granger?"  
  
For the second time in her life, Hermione was completely speechless.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me.  
  
  
  
How wonderful, Draco now has the perfect chance at pursuing a Romantic relationship. If only he would acknowledge the feelings he has for her. sighs Anyway, I can't wait to see what happens when they spend a whole night together. (I honestly don't know yet.) I actually got the whole sleeping on the floor idea from one of your reviews (I don't know whose right now, sorry, but I promise to tell in the next chapter), so there's an incentive to read and review. Hope you enjoyed this chapter. 


	11. Une nuit blanche a sleeples...

The person who gave me the idea for my last chapter in her review was Nicole Christensen. She asked me what Draco was "going to do now, sleep on her floor?" I took that idea and gave it my own twist. (I really couldn't imagine Mr. Arrogance personified sleeping on the floor. However, it could easily be the other way around!) So if you liked it, thank her.  
  
Anyway, the updates are going to become few and far between from now on, since my exams are starting. moans, cries, whines Anyway, I think they will be much more frequent after December 20th, which is when my last exam is on. So, to quote my msn nickname, "Patience is a virtue."  
  
Chapter 11: Une nuit blance (a sleepless night) Draco turned on his light for the fifth time, just to make sure that Hermione, no..Gran.oh what the hell, Hermione was still there. He saw her sleeping peacefully. Was she sleeping too peacefully, was she dead? No, her chest was moving, she was breathing, and her cheeks actually had some pinkness to them. Her bushy brown hair framed her face in such a way that it looked tiny. She looked so vulnerable, and she was. She was also beautiful. Draco immediately turned off his light, closed his eyes, and groaned. No, she was NOT beautiful. No Mudblood was supposed to be beautiful. Draco turned again, squeezed his eyes shut, and tried desperately to sleep.  
  
Despite Draco Malfoy's impression, Hermione was NOT sleeping peacefully. She may have been slightly messed up these past few days, but that didn't do anything to addle her brain. Despite the fact that she lacked experience in the field of Romance, she could not but notice the changes in her once arch enemy. For starters, the Draco Malfoy she knew would never have dreamed of making her sleep in his room. He would never have promised to keep her safe, and he would never have showed that he was worried about her. He would certainly not turn on his light five times just to make sure that she was safe. It seemed as though.as though he CARED about what was going to happened to her, and it was such a relief to feel cared for once in a while. But what if he didn't? What if she was just interpreting all the signs wrong? But what else could they mean?  
  
"Malfoy?" Hermione whispered.  
  
"You should be sleeping Granger" Came the authoritative voice from the bed.  
  
"Why should I? You aren't." Hermione persisted.  
  
Draco sighed, turned on his light, and sat up on his bed.  
  
"Alright, talk!"  
  
Hermione remained silent.  
  
"Look Granger, if you won't talk, I'm going to go to sleep."  
  
"You can't. So why try?" Hermione said. She was too tired for pretenses that night.  
  
Draco heaved a loud sigh, and lay back down.  
  
"You know, Honesty is one of your most undesirable traits Granger."  
  
"And lack of it is yours." Hermione snapped back.  
  
"Look Granger, if you just woke me up so that you could berate me about my lack of honesty, I'm.."  
  
"I didn't wake you up. You weren't sleeping. I need you to tell me why."  
  
"Why what?" Draco bit out.  
  
"Why you couldn't sleep." Hermione answered, her voice almost pleading.  
  
"Why does it matters to you Granger? My sleep, or lack of it, is my business."  
  
"Not if I'm the cause of it."  
  
".."  
  
He didn't deny it. For a strange reason, Hermione felt her heart fill just because Malfoy didn't deny it. It showed that he cared, and she needed desperately for someone to care. However, it also filled her with dread. How deep were his feelings for her? Did he care just because he felt responsible, or was there something more? And if there was, what was he going to do about it?  
  
"Granger?"  
  
"Y..yes?"  
  
"Why did you do it?"  
  
"Do what?"  
  
"What you did tonight. You know."  
  
"It wasn't your fault Malfoy."  
  
"I know."  
  
"You do?"  
  
"I've said meaner things to you before Granger. You didn't go and kill yourself then."  
  
"So why."  
  
"Why what?"  
  
Hermione got up. He was already staring at her.  
  
"Why are you doing this? Why are you taking care of me?"  
  
"I'm not.."  
  
"Please Malfoy. I can't deal with more lies. Not now."  
  
He sighed. Lay back down, and closed the lights. A few moments later, after Hermione had given up all hope, he whispered..  
  
"I don't know Granger. All I know is that I won't be able to sleep another night without knowing that you were safe. I know that it doesn't answer your question but.."  
  
"For now Draco, its enough."  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me.  
  
  
  
For this chapter I had a little help from my friend (I don't know love scenes) who I will call Deprez'd n Diztrb'd (this is her choice of name, and not mine) so I would like to acknowledge her right now. (I've never had a boyfriend.sniff.so no experience in the area of love.) Hope you liked it. 


	12. le baiser The kiss

He he, didn't I just say that I wasn't going to write? Well, I wasn't! I was truly resolved to study for my Biology exam, but alas..  
  
In response to some of the reviews, no, I don't think Ron or Harry are going to learn about Hermione's "adaptive behavior." Well, at least not soon. (ahem, I'm foreshadowing something aren't I?) Sorry, no spoilers. Well, may be just one. Alright, they will eventually know about what she's doing, but it won't be from her. (three guesses who's it going to be from.) Anyway, with my exams and all, I don't think its gonna come up very soon though.  
  
Btw, I apologize for making Draco swear. It just fits his character somehow, and I really can picture him saying "Oh dear" or "goodness gracious" or something polite when he's angry. I'll try to avoid it as much as I can, but sometimes is just necessary for he story.  
  
I hope the abrupt mood change wasn't too abrupt. I was a little worried about that, you know, the whole comical to mushy shift between chapters 10 and 11. The problem was, I was dying for some romance. Like, I started to whole story thinking about writing a little romantic piece and there wasn't a really sweet scene for like 10 chapters. I hope you guys didn't mind that much.  
  
Btw/ reviews actually help me continue writing..so you know what to do.  
  
Chapter 12: Le baiser (the kiss)  
  
By the end of the Ancient Runes exam, Hermione was practically able to forget her entire conversation with Draco Malfoy the night before. In fact, part of her was beginning to doubt whether the incident was a dream or reality. Why?  
  
At exactly 7.30 a.m. in the morning, she was woken up by the sound of a trumpet, yes a TRUMPET, bellowing in her ear and afterwards, she realized that it was none other than a prank from Draco Malfoy. This incident was followed by the scene described bellow.  
  
****~****  
  
"Granger, you have spent exactly 19 minutes in the shower. You have exactly 1 more minute to get OUT!" Draco shouted through the closed door.  
  
"Look, Malfoy. Since I have been hollering at you for the last 19 minutes, it is obvious that I am safe and well. A girl NEEDS more than 20 minutes in the shower for crying out loud. We're not even in a hurry, the Artihmancy exam is at 9:30." Granger shouted back, still in the process of washing her hair.  
  
"I always spend exactly 10 minutes in the shower and come out perfectly clean. Since you are a girl, I have allowed you an extra 10 minutes. You have thirty seconds left before I go in, so GET DRESSED!"  
  
***~*****  
  
This incident was followed by one of her typical breakfasts. She went to eat at the Gryffindor table with Harry and Ron, and, surprisingly this time, Malfoy and his crew came to bother them as usual. There was the whole mudbloood, muggle, Potty Head, name calling thing, followed by a few hexes, further insults, and then a final parting. By the end of it, Hermione could scarcely believe that last night was real.  
  
She breezed through her Arithmancy exam, came out last, to meet Malfoy and his crew's usual insults, and started to feel very confused. Was she just dreaming last night? And then after the Ancient Runes exam, she was SURE she had dreamt last night. Then, when she returned to her suite (which she WAS sharing with Malfoy), he managed to turn her whole reorganized world upside down again.  
  
"What were you playing at Granger?" He asked. He was seated on the sofa with his feet, complete with shoes, propped up on the center table.  
  
Hermione blinked. 'What was SHE playing at?"  
  
"Don't just stand there and look like an idiot, I asked you what you were playing at?"  
  
Hermione was without words.  
  
"Look Granger, you were distracting me during the entire day. I could barely keep my mind on the stupid exam. So answer me damn you!"  
  
"I.what the HECK did I do?" Hermione asked, truly unable to think of a better response.  
  
"Well.You.umm.I don't know. You distracted me!" He reiterated.  
  
"How?"  
  
"How am I supposed to know?"  
  
At this moment, Hermione had concluded that one of them, or both of them for that matter, was obviously crazy. They remained in an uncomfortable silence until Malfoy finally conceded.  
  
"I am acting rather irrational aren't I?"  
  
"I'm not even going to give you the courtesy of an answer." Hermione quipped.  
  
"Alright, I..ummm.I.darn it!"  
  
"You apologize?" Hermione asked.  
  
"I most certainly do not. I have done absolutely nothing wrong." Hermione could actually imagine him pouting.  
  
"If you were distracted by me, it couldn't have been my fault. I haven't done anything out of the ordinary today." Hermione said.  
  
"That's the point!" Malfoy growled.  
  
"What's the point?" Hermione asked, confused for a second time.  
  
"You acted so normal that I , well, I .I.lets forget it!"  
  
"No, lets not forget it. Ancient Runes was the last exam and people are going to start going home tomorrow. We are going to have to spend the rest of the summer together, and if you do not come to your senses soon, we will be sleeping in the same room. Now, finish your darn sentence!"  
  
"Look, I can't handle this!"  
  
"You can't handle what?"  
  
"This!"  
  
He got up, and stomped out of the room.  
  
***  
  
Hermione was in the shower. She was NOT cutting herself. The feelings she had due to Malfoy's strange actions, strangely, did not lead her towards cutting. He didn't make her fell betrayed, pressured, neglected, or hated. He just made her feel confused. VERY confused. So confused that she was sitting under the shower with all her clothes on. At that moment, Malfoy, burst through the door. Hermione jumped up, suddenly furious. What was HE doing in HER bathroom? And why was he so white?  
  
"What the fxxx are you doing in here Granger? Don't tell me you've just decided to drown yourself to death. You do KNOW that you can not drown yourself fin the shower right? You, GET OUT RIGHT THIS INSTANT."  
  
Hermione felt her control snap. For one of the few times in her life, Hermione did not guard her emotions. She didn't even understand them She didn't understand HIM! She didn't think that he bloody well understood himself!  
  
"How DARE you do this to me? First, you tell me that you care about me. Well, not in those exact words, but close enough. Then, you go through the entire day and act like nothing happened. Then, when I come back, you start blaming me and tell me that you couldn't take it anymore. And NOW, you are telling me when I can or can not shower? Who, Malfoy, may I ask, gave you the right to barge into my life and tell me what I can or cannot do? Why do you even care when I shower, how long I spend the darn thing, or whether or not I want to drown myself in it? I don't even use your shower anyway. You interfering, arrogant, self-absorbed little.." Draco kissed her, and Hermione forgot about everything  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me.  
  
Arrghhh.I hate this chapter.tell me what you think! 


	13. Connaise ton coeur Know your h...

Ummm.well.a few death threats ..and a revulsion towards the idea of studying biology (sniff.sniff.its only two days away!!) got me writing this chapter. Thanks for all the reviews.  
  
Umm.I'm sorry I have to make Draco spoil the kiss, its just in his character to do something like that. *sniff..sniff*  
  
By the way, in response to some of the reviews, I will try to be more descriptive in the love scenes. (I have been trying to avoid it, since it isn't my forte, but anyway.) bear with me.  
  
Oh..the purpose of this chapter is more to clarify some of the finer points, particularly why the two are spending the summer together. So I apologize if it's a bit boring.  
  
Chapter 13: Connaise ton Coeur. (know your heart)  
  
Hermione was stunned. Firstly, she had never pictured her first kiss to turn out this way. (Umm.she never kissed Victor Krum right?) Who on earth would picture being kissed in the middle of a verbal tirade, by her once-sworn arch enemy, in the shower, with her clothes dripping wet? Furthermore, who would picture the perpetrator of this kiss staring at her, looking absolutely furious, with his hands on his hips, and saying  
  
"What the hell did you do that for?"  
  
Hermione blinked. What the he...heck did she do now?  
  
They were now both standing in the shower, both wet, but neither seemed to care.  
  
"Well Granger, answer my question." Draco said.  
  
"I think, Malfoy, that you would have to be more specific. What exactly are you accusing me of?" Hermione asked, bristling. No, this was not how she had pictured her first kiss at all.  
  
"Making me kiss you!" Draco said, sounding completely indignant.  
  
"I did not MAKE you do anything!" but her voice lacked strength and anger. She was pretty flattered actually.  
  
"Well, you didn't do it directly, but you.. its still YOUR fault!" Draco persevered. However, he did sound lame, even to himself.  
  
"You know Malfoy, I need to go send Harry and Ron back for the summer Holidays, why don't you sort your feelings out, and tell me when you begin to understand yourself because honestly, I CAN'T!"  
  
****  
  
Hermione was in the library. She had sent both her friends off to their summer holidays and Hogwarts now seemed surprisingly empty. She had no idea what she was reading. She couldn't concentrate. She heard footsteps behind her heart jumped a beat, thinking that it was Draco Malfoy. However, it wasn't.  
  
"Good afternoon Ms. Granger. May I have a word with you?" Professor Dumbledore asked. He didn't look his usual happy self.  
  
"Of course Professor," Hermione answered, but she was beginning to panic. What had happened?  
  
"I had a little chat with Poppy, I mean Madame Pomfrey, yesterday. She seemed to be very worried about you."  
  
"Umm.I don't know why. I told her it was an accident." Hermione fibbed. However, she was unable to meet his eyes.  
  
"I see Ms. Granger. May I ask a personal question?"  
  
"Sure Professor. Anything."  
  
"Why didn't you go back home this summer?"  
  
Hermione, squirmed. It was indeed a personal question. She thought she heard footsteps behind her, turned around, to find only emptiness. When she turned back, she thought she saw a twinkle in Professor Dumbledore's eyes.  
  
"Ms. Granger?"  
  
"I.well.I had personal problems."  
  
"Alright. May I see your wrists Ms. Granger?"  
  
Hermione squirmed. She knew that the excessive scaring in that area would be noticed immediately. But what choice did she have? Suddenly, they both heard a crash. When they turned in that direction, they saw Draco Malfoy standing next to an overturned book case. Heaving a sigh of relief, Hermione moved to help him rectify the situation.  
  
"Ms. Granger."  
  
Hermione stopped in her tracks.  
  
"I will allow you to help save Mr. Malfoy from Madame Pince, for the time being. However, if I get another report of this nature from Madame Pomfrey again, you will not be let off so easily. Do I make myself clear?" With that, Professor Dumbledore left. However, he seemed to be in a much better mood than he was before.  
  
*** Hermione and Draco restacked the shelves in complete silence. When they were done, Draco decided to break it.  
  
"What personal problems did you have Granger?"  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"What personal problems did you have that made you unable to go home this summer?"  
  
"They're personal"  
  
"You do have a flair for stating the obvious don't you Granger?"  
  
"Why are YOU here by the way?"  
  
"That's none of your business."  
  
"Then my reason is none of yours."  
  
The both remained in an uncomfortable silence. Finally, Draco heaved a huge sigh and said.  
  
"If I tell you my reason for staying here, would you reciprocate?"  
  
"Umm."  
  
"Come on Granger. Where's your spirit? We will be sharing a room for another two months. Do you want this hanging over us?"  
  
"Since when was there an us?"  
  
"There isn't one. Stop avoiding the question Granger"  
  
"Fine. But you first! And if I don't believe you, the deal's off." Hermione ground out.  
  
"I'm leverage."  
  
"What!??"  
  
"It's my father's way of showing the Ministry of Magic that he isn't a death eater. If he acts concerned over You Know Who's return and insists that I stay in the hands of Professor Dumbledore during the summer, they won't suspect him and what he's doing. Appearances are everything Granger, or haven't you figured that out yet. Now, its your turn."  
  
".."  
  
"Come on Granger, a deal is a deal.'  
  
"Why are you so interested in why I'm here anyway? And why did you trust me with that piece of information?"  
  
"You're dodging the question Granger." Or was He?  
  
"Fine. My parents are having a divorce and they claim they don't want to put me through such a 'traumatic experience.' Not that staying here makes it any less traumatic." Hermione answered. Afterwards, she actually felt better at having confided in someone. Even if it was Draco Malfoy.  
  
"That's it?" Draco asked in an incredulous voice.  
  
"You make is seem so trivial."  
  
"But it is Granger." For some reason, him doing so made it actually seem trivial to her too.  
  
"Well, why don't we discuss something that's not so trivial?"  
  
"Like?"  
  
"Like why you've been acting like an emotional roller coaster lately."  
  
"Have I?" Draco answered is his most innocent voice.  
  
"I don't think you deserve an answer."  
  
"That bad?" he asked.  
  
Hermione just rolled her eyes.  
  
"Why does it matter to you Granger?"  
  
"I happen to be living with you remember. I don' like to be, umm.you know.and then blamed for it or something" Hermione stammered. This was beginning to get a bit too embarrassing for her.  
  
"You don't?"  
  
Hermione felt a strange urge to stamp her feet in frustration.  
  
"Well, you told me to go and understand myself right?  
  
"Was it a quest in futility?" Hermione asked.  
  
"No."  
  
"It wasn't?" Hermione was shocked.  
  
"No."  
  
Hermione suppressed the urge to tap her foot on the ground.  
  
"So, what did you find out?"  
  
He moved towards her, tilted her chin up, looked into her eyes, bent down, and kissed her. Hermione closed her eyes and tried to savor the moment. This time, the kiss wasn't rushed, and it wasn't forceful. His lips were tender on hers, persuading her to respond to him rather than forcing it. And this time, it wasn't born out of frustration and lack of control. He seemed so sure of himself, and his certainty, made her feel surer too. When it was over, Hermione could barely breath. She felt as if her legs had turned to jelly. But before she could recover from her shock, Draco aws walking away.  
  
"Draco!"  
  
He turned, looking at her innocently.  
  
"you haven't answered my question." She said, still flushed.  
  
"Yes,.Hermione., I have."  
  
blushes profusely and hides under the table. Well, this, guys, is as descriptive as I can get without being overcome by embarrassment. .  
  
Please read and review,  
  
especially if you want me to continue. (I rhymed!)  
  
Oh.almost forgot.  
  
I asked one of my friends on how I should end this story. He suggested the following ending. - They fall in love, Draco dumps her, and she cuts again, and she kills herself. The world reverts back to normal, just without hermione there. Umm.well, I had to admit that that was a pretty good ending, so unless I get like constructive suggestions from u guys, I might actually use it. (is this considered blackmail? ) So, unless you approve of his ending, *points to the review button repeatedly*, better give me lots of alternatives to choose from.  
  
Disclaimer:  
  
Dear Ms. Rowling,  
  
Your characters I am using,  
  
I don't own them,  
  
But I do love them,  
  
Please don't consider suing. 


	14. Je ne t'aime pas I don't lov...

Wow! Fifty reviews over night??? Still in shock! I should threaten to kill Hermione more often! Just kidding. Well, I read all the reviews, and most of the suggested endings were great, but I'm not gonna tell you guys which ones I 'll use though. (notice the plural, it will be a combination of a lot of them) There is a Majority vote, I think, that no one wants Hermione dead. (only about 5 out of fifty reviewers wanted the sad ending) (Am I right?) So, well.who knows. I'm very unpredictable, it'll depend on my mood. (leaves a dramatic silence). Well, no. I am not gonna kill Hermione!!! She's my favourite character too! But I can't guarantee a happy ending though..devilish grin , just to keep you all in suspense. Actually, its just really hard making it a Happy Ending without making the whole story sound soap opera-ish. But I'll promise I'll try really hard.  
  
Oh, well, in response to some of the complaints. Chrissy, I know Draco's OoC, and he'll probably get more so in the next chapters. I'm sorry, but I really can't make it romantic if he doesn't change. I'll try to keep a short leash on myself though. And efa, I'm sorry about the rating thing. I didn't think that cutting would warrant an R-rating, but I'll change it as soon as I can.  
  
Anyway, here's the next chapter.  
  
Chapter 14: Je ne peux pas t'aimer (I can not love you)  
  
Draco Malfoy had been staring at his room's ceiling for an hour. Not that the ceiling wasn't beautiful, it was. There were stars slowly rotating past him, with an occasional bird fluttering by. However, no ceiling should be able to capture his attention for an hour. Especially if it was now past midnight.  
  
Draco had to admit that Hermione was right. He hadn't given her an answer. Not the one she was looking for. His kiss and the way he did it simply meant that he was sure that he wanted to kiss her. Actually, there was no question about that. He still wanted to kiss her, and many other things besides. The other things would have to wait though. He refused to let his mind dwell on how soft her lips were, and how sweetly she kissed him back. The point was that her minuteness of her response made it all the more endearing to him. It hinted that she had never been kissed by anyone else but him, and that he was to first person to stir up these feelings inside her. It filled him with pride, however, it also filled him with dread. How much was HE willing to give?  
  
He refused to ask himself whether he loved her. He WANTED her, wasn't that enough? He couldn't stand seeing her hurt, he wanted her to be his, he wanted to spend every hour of the day within her sight. Was lust able to justify all these feelings he had for her? It HAD to, there simply wasn't any other way. As long as his feelings for her remained that of pure physical desire, he wasn't in any danger. Although Lucius would not approve of his dalliance with a Muggle-born, he wouldn't do anything as long as he thought that it was merely a fling. A school-time romance, and nothing more. The problem was that Draco had a gut feeling that it was going to be much more, and he knew that he had to do everything in his power to prevent that. He had to stop himself from falling in love with her. The kiss was a mistake. The whole situation was a mistake. There could never be anything between them, especially not love. It was too dangerous.too complicated. She wasn't in the state of mind to be logical about this, but he had to. He started it, and he damn well was going to get both of them out of it. He was going to call it off, right now, before it was too late for both of them. But what if it was too late already?  
  
"Granger, are you asleep?"  
  
"Well, since you woke me, I'm not anymore." She answered. However, her voice had no trace of sleepiness.  
  
"I didn't mean to kiss you this afternoon."  
  
"You seemed pretty sure to me."  
  
"Well, it was a mistake."  
  
"I see."  
  
But she didn't see. She didn't see at all. She felt tears starting to well up in her eyes. Why was he doing this to her? Why did he fill her with happiness one moment and drain it all out the next? She didn't understand him at all.  
  
"Actually, it wasn't"  
  
Make up you mind dammit, she thought to herself, but was too overwhelmed to say anything out loud.  
  
"I wanted to kiss you."  
  
"Malfoy.why are we having this conversation?" her voice was shaking, and Draco felt his resolve shatter.  
  
"Look, Granger..I.I just want to make sure that you..well..that you're not expecting more than I can give."  
  
"I don't expect anything." But Hermione knew it was a lie.  
  
"Well, that's good. I just wanted to make sure."  
  
"Spit it out Malfoy!" Hermione snapped. She felt as if her heart was breaking, but she refused to let him know that.  
  
"I don't love you Granger. I want you. Hell, you have no idea how much I want you. But it isn't love."  
  
Hermione was silent.  
  
"Granger?......Hermione?"  
  
"Is that what you want?" she asked, her voice exuding a calm she did not have.  
  
"What?"  
  
"a purely physical relationship. No emotions involved."  
  
"Yes." But Draco had a disconcerting feeling that he was lying.  
  
"Well, I can't give it to you."  
  
With that response, Hermione got up, walked out of his room, and slammed the door shut.  
  
Disclaimer:  
  
Ms. J.K. Rowling, You're a wonderful writer Who made up all the characters That I am now using.  
  
So I'm telling everyone here I know, That they do not belong to me, What I will do with them, you shall see, So please do not sue me.  
  
(alright, that was a bad one)  
  
  
  
Oh, by the way, just because Hermione's no longer at risk doesn't mean you should stop reviewing. It keeps me going you see..you know, forces me to atleast write a chapter a day during my exam week. (sniff.sniff.oh please, come Christmas break fast!) And, ummm.I 've been wondering for a while now, what does "angst" mean? 


	15. une reve ou une prophetie? A ...

Yeah, well, I should be studying for math and physics now, but anyway.. Couldn't help it. Oh, there were a LOT of reviews over the weekend, so here's the answers to some of the questions.  
  
To Chrissy ( No, Draco is not a sex mania, he just doesn't recognize his love for Hermione, and as you see in this chapter, he might never!?? Keep you fingers crossed.  
  
Umm..-- the too short chapters complaints? Well, the chapters will be longer once I finish my exams and college apps. I'll make it part of my new year resolution. : - P  
  
Oh..Just a question? Since you're all experienced writers and all, I need your advice. When the couple get, you know, "intimate," which is soon, *hint hint*, how descriptive can a get and keep the story PG-13? (U know, do they kiss and then the lights go out and I say "imagine the rest" or do I get a little bit more descriptive and then lights go out and I say "imagine the rest.") Need help!  
  
Oh, part of the ideas from this chapter came from a Romance by Elizabeth Lowell called Enchanted which I should NOT have been reading during my exams. Anyway, I acknowledge, her here and now, so don't sue me. And ofcourse, Hermione and Draco and the rest of the Harry Potter crew belong to J.K. Rowlings, I don't own them. (do I have to say this every chapter.)  
  
Chapter 15: Une rêve, ou une prophétie? (A dream, or a prophecy ?)  
  
Hermione cried as if her heart had been torn out. She felt that way. She didn't understand Draco. She didn't understand it at all. She clutched a piece of broken glass in her hand, she clasped it until blood started dripping through her fingers onto the white linen sheets of her room. No, she wouldn't cut this time. She wouldn't cut for him. He wasn't worth it! She clasped the shard tighter, watching her blood trickle down. She wasn't cutting was she? Hot tears ran down her cheeks. Why did he have to be this way? And why did she need him to love her so much?  
  
She felt a soft breeze brush pass her. 'That's odd.' She thought. She was sure she hadn't opened the shutters. Strangely, her eye lids started to feel heavy, her body relaxed, and for the first time since Draco had stepped into her life, she fell into a deep, peaceful sleep.  
  
** Hermione found her self in the middle of the woods. Everything was dark, except for an illuminated tree in the center. What was odd was the silence. There were no sounds, no whispering of the wind brushing through the tears, no chirping of birds, no rustling, just complete eerie silence. It was like this place was not for life.  
  
She heard a sound behind her. Draco was there too. He looked calm, but his eyes were darting about warily, as if sensing danger. He advanced towards her, but then stopped two feet short of her. He refused to come any closer. He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came, as if he was forbidden to break the silence of the woods.  
  
Suddenly, both of them felt a breeze, the same breeze that had caused them to drift into their sleep. The illuminated tree rustled, moved, as if awakening from a long slumber. The tree shone brighter, and in the center of it, Hermione could barely see the image of a woman, eyes red from too much crying, looking at them with hope and fear.  
  
She shifted, as if wanting to speak, but then disappeared. Unconsciously, Hermione backed towards Draco, seeking his protection. His hand clasped around her, and then he shook. He was staring at her hand, she had forgot that they were bloody. He looked at her accusingly, but still refused to speak to her.  
  
Suddenly, the breeze drifted again, this time, as it moved, the leaves whispered.  
  
"Listen..Listen.wizard..listen."  
  
Hermione turned to Draco, his jaw was kept in a firm line; he ignored it.  
  
Suddenly, Hermione saw the image of wizard, dressed in a mantle and heavy armor. His form was translucent, barely discernable. For some reason, the wizard reminded her of Draco. He was clutching someone in his arms, his body was shaking with unreleased remorse. But he too, said nothing.  
  
"Listen.Listen.wizard.listen before its too late."  
  
Hermione suddenly fell very weak. It was as if blood was draining from her body. She felt numb, she could no longer stand. She fell, but Draco caught her. She felt him shaking.  
  
"Draco."Hermione said softly. "Please.." she asked, not knowing what she was asking for.  
  
He looked torn, but he pursed his lips together. He refused to say it.  
  
Suddenly, the night turned even darker, the breeze became gusts of wind blowing both their robes and blinding their eyes. Finally, Hermione closed hers, too weak to think. Suddenly she heard it, it was a keening, wailing sound. A rumbling, a prediction, a prophecy, said with so much force and so much sorrow that it burnt her heart.:  
  
****  
  
Draco woke up, a silent shout in his throat, but he didn't know what the shout was. He stared blankly at the wall in front of him and was shocked to see a large framed portrait of a medieval wizard who looked remarkably like him. The wizard had his hair, his eyes, and even his look. However, the eyes of the wizard were sad. So sad. The portrait did not move, unlike most wizard portraits, but on it surface, just below the wizard's face, golden words were written. A Poem? A prophecy? But whose? Draco read slowly, as if mesmerized by the words, as if the wizard in the portrait was begging him to read.  
  
For centuries, and centuries hence,  
  
'til all that was, comes again to be,  
  
The bride's tears shall flow in silence,  
  
'til it overflows the seven seas.  
  
  
  
Tears wept,  
  
for a love  
  
that never could have been,  
  
Tears wept,  
  
for a tragedy,  
  
long ago foreseen.  
  
The tragedy of a wizard,  
  
Whose ambition, hate, and pride,  
  
Had turned his heart as hard,  
  
As the stone castle in which he resides.  
  
The tragedy of a sorceress,  
  
Whose heart knew naught of hate,  
  
Who deserved to have been blessed,  
  
But was cursed by wretched fate.  
  
One loved with all her heart,  
  
Knowing that it could not be,  
  
One tore this love apart,  
  
Too blind, too proud to see.  
  
And the sky wept at the cruelty of fate,  
  
Who dealt the final, fatal blow,  
  
And where was buried that love learnt too late,  
  
A magical tree did grow.  
  
The tree that was the Slytherin bride,  
  
Will weep forever more,  
  
For the love that needed to hide,  
  
For the love that can be no more.  
  
But there will come again a day,  
  
Where the wizard must live once more,  
  
For the debt that he must pay,  
  
To the witch he loved before.  
  
And another witch will this time be cursed,  
  
To love this man who could not feel,  
  
And her fate will be much worse,  
  
Than her predecessor's ordeal  
  
And if again the wizard should fail,  
  
To see the path to love so true,  
  
There would come storm, snow and hail,  
  
And darkness shall ensue.  
  
But if love could this time be taught  
  
To the wizard who knew naught but hate,  
  
The life of his love will be bought,  
  
From the Slytherin's Bride at heaven's gate.  
  
What the hell? Draco thought. This must be a joke. Hermione must be playing a trick on him, for what he did. Suddenly, Draco's blood ran cold. He remembered, his dream, he remembered the blood. He got up in a rush and ran out of his room. He had completely forgotten about the portrait, and the prophecy. 


	16. sans amour without love

Why, Why, WHY OH WHY DID I TAKE PHYSICS????????? Sobs, cries. It wouldn't have made any difference if I hadn't studied. I ACTUALLY studied for it for HOURS. And it didn't help!!!!!!!!!!!! Cries some more. I'm gonna FLUNKKKKKKK.  
  
Any way, 12 exams done, and only 2 to go and both of them I can't study for, and I don't care anymore, I'm gonna flunk out anyway, and math was worse, and people 10 times smarter than me got rejected from colleges and they actually early decisioned and.oii.Hermione and Draco more important.  
  
By the way, my melancholy mood will NOT affect what happens to Hermione, I think? :'(  
  
Chapter 16: Sans Amour (without love)  
  
Hermione's door was locked, and unlike the accomplished, usually calm, cool headed, uncaring wizard that he thought he was, Draco kicked the door in. Yes, he KICKED THE DOOR IN, no "Alohomora," no knocking, no remembering that his key actually could actually open her room. Draco just simply kicked.  
  
The door didn't budge. He kicked again, harder. It still didn't budge. (because it is magical maybe?) He kicked it five more times before remembering that he was, in fact, a wizard, which caused him to take out his wand and say the magic words.  
  
Hermione was sleeping in her bed. Strangely, despite the 7 times Draco had kicked, she hadn't woken up. (three guesses why?) In two extremely long strides, Draco was at her bed. He pulled off her covers, revealing an extremely pale sleeping girl on extremely bloody sheets. To his surprise, she didn't slit her wrist this time. She was probably thinking about it, since she had a rather sharp shard of glass in her hand, but she didn't slit her wrist. What she did was much worse!  
  
Hermione was clearly having a nightmare. Her forehead was beaded with perspiration and tears were flowing from her closed eyes. She was holding the glass shard precariously close to her neck, where it was beginning to leave blood marks. Her grip on it was so tight that her whole hand was bloody.  
  
Draco swore, and swore, and swore again. He grabbed Hermione's shoulders and shook her as hard as he could, trying desperately to wake her. However, she seemed to be too absorbed in her dream, and she didn't open her eyes.  
  
"Dammit Granger. Wake up right now!"  
  
She didn't. Draco swore, and pointed his wand at her hand. His spell knocked it out, but it left a bloody gash. She woke up!  
  
"Draco.What ."  
  
"Ameliorate!" Draco spat out.  
  
Hermione watched her wound heal and the scars disappear. Then astonishment sank in.  
  
"Draco, that's an advanced healing spell. You didn't know it 2 nights ago!"  
  
"Well, you're damn lucky I do now aren't you Granger? What did you think you were doing? Don't tell me that you just hug shards of glass to sleep on an everyday basis." But Draco already knew that answer, and it made his belly knot up with guilt. HE caused this.  
  
As if she could read his mind, Hermione replied.  
  
"Don't flatter yourself Malfoy. For your information, this was actually an accident. I had just decided not to cut when I fell asleep. I just had a nightmare that's all."  
  
"From now on you are NEVER to sleep anywhere accept on my floor."  
  
"I think you forgot something Malfoy."  
  
She lifted her hands up to face him.  
  
"You had just erased all my scars. Even if you report me to Dumbledore, there is no longer any evidence. Which MEANS, I can sleep anywhere I like."  
  
"Fine!" Draco said, and laid down on her bed.  
  
"What the heck do you think you're doing?"  
  
"I thought it was obvious Granger, since I can't make you sleep on MY floor, I'm going to make you sleep on YOUR floor. It makes little difference."  
  
"Oh no you don't Draco Malfoy. This is MY bed, this is MY room, you GET OUT!"  
  
"No.!"  
  
And Draco just laid there. No matter how much she pushed, shoved, and ordered him to leave, he wouldn't budge. Too proud to sleep on the floor, Hermione laid down next to him. The bed wasn't small, but it wasn't big either. There was barely a foot separating them.  
  
"What was your dream about Granger?"  
  
"My dreams are private."  
  
"Tell me." It wasn't a command. It was a request.  
  
Hermione was stubbornly quiet for awhile, but she could never be angry at any one for long, so she finally answered.  
  
"A dark forest, a bright tree, you and me." She said.  
  
"A dark wizard? A dead bride?" he countered.  
  
"How did you know?" she asked  
  
"I had a similar one, or perhaps the same one. I don't know. What else? What made you so sad? Why were you crying?"  
  
"It was.as if I could see through her eyes. I don't know what happened, I just felt what she.the tree.felt. It was as if someone had broken her heart, body, and soul all at once. There was nothing left but sorrow. I..I don't know."  
  
"What do you see in us?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"us?"  
  
"There is no us."  
  
"There was one, a few hours ago."  
  
"Well, you had made sure that there is no longer one. So why ask?"  
  
"Hypothetically, if I didn't..well..say the things I did tonight, what did you think would happen?"  
  
Hermione was silent for a long while. Finally, she sighed. He was right.  
  
"Nothing. There could never be anything between us. It's just, not meant to be."  
  
"Then why were you crying?"  
  
"It didn't matter."  
  
"What?"  
  
Hermione turned to face him, he was already looking at her.  
  
"The mind and the heart are two separate things Draco."  
  
"I don't have a heart."  
  
"You can't say that!"  
  
"It's true. That's why I can't love you. I never will."  
  
"Then why."  
  
"Why what?"  
  
"Why are you here? Why didn't you just leave me to die? Why did you go out and teach yourself an advanced spell just to help me? Why did you kiss me?"  
  
"I...wanted.you. Its not love, its just.desire."  
  
Hermione didn't believe him. But was she willing to risk heartbreak for someone who didn't know his own heart? Someone who may never will? And when heartbreak did come, what would happen to her?  
  
"Hold me Draco."  
  
"Hermione..I told you.."  
  
"I'm not asking you to love me. I'm not asking for a future. I'm not asking for anything besides you forgetting everything - the world, your parents, who we are - and just keeping me safe in your arms tonight. Can you give me that?"  
  
Draco groaned, but he edged towards her enveloping her in his arms. Uncontrollably, he bent down to kiss her. In that moment, he forgot everything. He didn't care what his father would do, he didn't care that he would certainly break her heart one day. All he cared about was exploring her mouth, exploring her body, and showing her how much he wanted her.  
  
Hermione felt the same way. But when Draco started crushing her body to his, she knew she had to stop it, before it was too late.  
  
"Draco.."  
  
He paused, but the way he stared into her eyes clearly told her that he didn't intend to let her go.  
  
"If we...do this. It'll never be the same again."  
  
"I know"  
  
"Draco, listen to me. No matter how detached you are emotionally, this will change us. You won't be able to brush me off without hurting, both yourself and I. You won't be able to forget this. You won't be able to just let it go."  
  
"I will, and I'll break your heart doing it."  
  
"What about yours?"  
  
"I don't have one." "Draco.."  
  
He kissed her again and cradled her face in his palms before asking  
  
"Do you want me to stop?"  
  
"I."  
  
"You want me as much as I do you."  
  
"Draco.please."  
  
"Hermione. Listen to me.we.we can't avoid this. Even if we stop tonight, we'll end up in the same position, again.".he kissed her."and again."..he gasped for breath.. "and again." Hermione dug her face into his shoulder, trying to avoid the unavoidable.  
  
"Why put yourself through that torment." He asked  
  
"You don't love me."  
  
"It doesn't matter."  
  
".." Hermione felt like crying. She wanted, desperately, to believe that he was lying. That he actually did love her. But what if he didn't?  
  
"Hermione?"  
  
He tipped her chin up, his eyes asking the silent question.  
  
She didn't say no.  
  
Faintly, in the back of her mind, while Draco was kissing her senseless, Hermione heard a soft whisper. She closed her eyes and focused on Draco's kiss. It didn't matter. As long as he held her like this, she didn't care what happened to her.  
  
" Another witch will this time be cursed,  
  
To love this man who could not feel,  
  
And her fate will be much worse,  
  
Than her predecessor's ordeal  
  
And if again the wizard should fail,  
  
To see the path to love so true,  
  
There would come storm, snow and hail,  
  
And darkness shall ensue."  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me.  
  
This is NOT a cliff hanger. This is as far as I'm gonna go in a love scene, so use your imagination.  
  
Claps to CrystallineLily for understanding the implications behind the last lines of my poem. Very smart, evil grin. Who knows what the future will bring?  
  
Anyway, this is my first real undiluted all the way love scene, so read and review. 


	17. pas de temps no time

I'm DDDOOOONNEEE. EXAMS are OOOVVVEEEERRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! : - p, sorry but I just had to do that. YIPPEE!!!!. knocks herself on the head and forces herself to snap out of it.  
  
well, since I'm in such a jovial mood, I'm gonna respond to some people that asked me specific questions or specific comments. If you reviewed but didn't, thanks any way, you made my day, and just scroll pass these people to where the chapter starts. (btw, some of the responses are semi- spoilers, so if you're interested, maybe you should take a peak :-P)  
  
Rikka: Well, I HAD finals. gloats Anyway, thanks for reminding me of that. Oh, colleges? I sent like 9 apps to the US today, will send like another 5 more to Canada by January, one to Singapore, and some in Thailand. (I'm very scared about not getting into college.) If you want details, email me.  
  
Sarah (): Yep, that happened to me to. It's not your computer. No idea what to do about it.  
  
Chrissy (both of you): Well, I didn't realize there were two, but now that I do, may be you could figure out a way to distinguish yourselves. Just a suggestion.  
  
Amber: NO! Not that it isn't possible, but I hate babies. Never could tolerate them, even the cute ones. Therefore, I am not gonna let them into my story.  
  
Cyropi: Thanks. Actually, it wasn't really an option. I just didn't know how to go into detail. : - P  
  
Tracy: Well, lets say Draco will come out of this mess a better person. Haven't decided about Hermione yet.  
  
S-Star: Hmm.thanks. Yes, I understand what you were trying to say. Maybe its cuz I usually write to ease my own depression but have a comical style. : - p  
  
Deathvalley 79: umm.well, according to the poem/prophecy, I think Hermione's already sortoff in love but Draco wont' realize it t'il the very end. I'll try to add some more fluff though.  
  
  
  
Chapter 17: Pas de temps. (no time)  
  
Hermione stared at her plate. She couldn't bring herself to face Draco, to face anyone as a matter of fact, without blushing. Therefore, she tried to force herself to simply focus on deciding what type of vegetables were on her plate. She realized after 15 minutes of staring that there weren't any. In fact, the only thing on her plate was a piece of bread.  
  
Draco was trying desperately to suppress the grin plastered on his face since morning. For an extremely strange reason, he hadn't been able to stop smiling since morning, and Hermione blushing every time she met his eyes didn't help the situation any. Hermione had never struck him as being shy, but he had to admit that when she was, she appeared very cute, and he simply couldn't stop smiling at her. She looked up, caught his eye, blushed, and resumed staring at her plate. Draco smiled again. They spent their breakfast in a comfortable silence. Neither of them ate.  
  
"Albus, we have to do something about this." Professor McGonagal whispered as she watched the head boy and head girl not eat their breakfasts. The attraction was obvious since the beginning of the summer, but now, now she was afraid that it wasn't just attraction.  
  
"What can we do Minerva, besides let it be?" Professor Dumbledore answered, but his eyebrows were furrowed and he had a worried look in his eyes.  
  
"At the least we should separate their sleeping quarters. Who knows what they are doing at night." McGonagal snapped, her voice full with exasperation.  
  
"Minerva, you were the one who told Siverus that school-time Romances are better left untouched. Separating adolescents only make them strive harder to get together." He answered, but he still looked worried.  
  
"Albus, you know this is different. Nothing good can come of this!"  
  
Professor Dumbledore sighed.  
  
"And nothing good will come of our meddling. Their destinies were written long before we were born Minerva. Surely you know that."  
  
"Albus, so its true? The prophecy...."  
  
"The painting appeared in Mr. Malfoy's quarters tonight. The prophecy is written on it."  
  
Professor McGonagal let out a sigh of relief.  
  
"So he knows. He knows that he must not make the same mistake again."  
  
Professor Dumbledore shook his head.  
  
"He will see what he wants to see Minerva. The portrait will spur his curiousity, but it won't influence what he will do."  
  
"But he has to love her. The portrait would never have appeared otherwise." McGonagal protested feebly.  
  
"The prophecy requires the love of the witch, Minerva, not the wizard. His inability to love is what makes him Aelfred's heir."  
  
"But if they are left together for the entire summer, certainly there is a chance that he will learn to love." McGonagal exclaimed. Suddenly, there was a large crashing sound at the school Doors. The doors had been pushed forcefully open, slamming into the stone walls of the castle. And striding through those doors was none other than a furious- looking Lucius Malfoy.  
  
Dumbledore sighed again. And as he got up, he said  
  
"I'm afraid, Minerva, that he doesn't even have that time."  
  
Draco rose the moment he heard the crash. Sensing danger, he instinctively grasped Hermione's wrist and shielded her body with his. He regret that move when he saw that it was his father who was advancing towards him. He had never seen his father this furious before.  
  
Lucius Malfoy stopped exactly 5 feet away from his son. Their eyes clashed, the same steely, unfeeling grey, but this time, Lucius noticed that his son's eyes had changed. There was something different about it. Something far, far, warmer. He didn't like it. Then his eyes move to look at the girl standing behind his son. He remembered her vaguely as the Mudblood he met at the bookshop 4 years earlier, when he gave Tom Riddle's diary to that Weasley girl. He noticed that his sons hands were clasped around her wrist, his stance protective. This was worse than he thought.  
  
"Lucius, to what does Hogwarts owe this visit?" He heard Professor Dumbledore ask.  
  
"I'm simply here to see to the welfare of my son, Headmaster."  
  
"Well, you can see that your son is fine." He heard Minerva McGonagal say.  
  
His mouth curved bitterly.  
  
"I wouldn't say THAT."  
  
He turned to Draco and the Mudblood girl and said, to no one in particular.  
  
"I would like a private word with my son."  
  
He saw his son squeeze the girl's hand reassuringly before coming towards him.  
  
"Certainly father, maybe we should go.."  
  
"Take that Muggle-born with you." He ordered.  
  
"Father?" "Lucius!" Draco, Dumbledore, and McGonagal said at once.  
  
"This concerns her. I would like to speak to them both." He ground out. "Or..." He turned toward the girl, "are you afraid Muggle-born."  
  
Hermione stepped back, looked a Draco, before saying softly to the two professors.  
  
"If this concerns me, then perhaps I should go."  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me.  
  
  
  
I'm not that mean, the next chapter's coming in less than an hour. I just didn't want to drag on and on. Read and review. 


	18. les responses the answe...

Chapter 18: les responses (answers)  
  
Lucius observed the untouched bed of his son's room and turned toward's the couple.  
  
"So, Mudblood, I see that my son had visited you last night." He remarked, his brows quirking into a mocking glare. Hermione bit down on her lip, but said nothing. What could she say?  
  
"Father."  
  
"Be silent Draco. Do not make excuses. Indulgences of the flesh aren't discouraged, but I thought you would have better taste." His eyes raked Hermione's body, staring at her from head to toe. Draco clenched his hand, but said nothing.  
  
"Is this what you wanted to discuss Mr. Malfoy, if so, I think I should leave." Hermione asked.  
  
"You should be taught manners girl. Never speak to your betters in such a manner."  
  
"You are not my better." Hermione said, her expression blank. She felt a slap across her face but continued to glare back mutinously. In truth she was thoroughly humiliated. No one had ever treated her in such a demeaning manner before. However, what hurt her more was the fact that Draco wasn't doing anything about it. He was just standing there allowing his father to treat her like.like.like a prostitute. If he loved her he wouldn't...but he didn't love her did he?  
  
"If you make another move like that again Mr. Malfoy, I'm going to report this incident to the head master. NEVER lay hands on me again!"  
  
If look could kill, Hermione knew that she would be dead. However, it couldn't, and Lucius Malfoy actually stepped back at her threat.  
  
"Father, you said that you wanted to talk to us." Draco said, his voice cold, indifferent. Inside he was seething with anger, both towards his father and toward himself. However, he knew from experience that the more he acted in Hermione's defense, the more danger she would be in. He also knew that anger in these situations did no good. He needed to remain calm. But GOD, he could kill his father at this moment.  
  
"Yes, I have come to remind you of some facts, and I thought that she," he gestured towards Hermione, "should know them as well."  
  
"Say it father, and be done with it." Draco snapped. His father glared at him and Draco fought against his anger for calm. He needed to remain calm if he was going to deal with this.  
  
"You are aware that your marriage in the future will be with someone from a family of consequence, one equal to ours?"  
  
Draco nodded. He knew this since he was 10. His father had never let him forget it. Hermione felt as if she was drowning, but she kept her expression blank.  
  
"Then keep your dalliances discreet for God's sake. I do not care what you do with that Mudblood under the cover of night but reports of your 'affection' for her must never reach my ears again! Do you here me?"  
  
Draco nodded. "I wasn't aware that I wasn't being discreet." He said. Hermione felt as if he was tearing out her heart. How did she let herself become part of this? How could she let herself love him?  
  
"Well, actually, you weren't. But I know about everything in your life Draco. Or have you forgotten that?"  
  
Draco pursed his lips. He knew that his father had never trusted him. He had spies everywhere and every summer, his father would greet him with of list of all his foibles during the year. He didn't know how, but his father was privy to all his secrets, and this one was big enough to make him come here today.  
  
"There could be nothing between you and the Mudblood. If there is, you will loose EVERYTHING do you hear me? No son of mine will marry a Muggle and live to see the next day. I will not allow it. I will kill you before I let it be. Do you understand me Draco?"  
  
"Yes, father. I understand you perfectly." Draco bit out. He reminded himself to keep calm, but he knew that his anger was showing in his eyes. It only increased when he saw Hermione's lips tremble. He knew that what was hurting her were his responses, not his father's questions.  
  
"Then remember who you are, and remember who you will become in the future. Sleep with her if you must, seeing that she's the only girl in this school during the summer, but lust must be the only thing between you two. Do I make myself clear?"  
  
"Crystal." Draco answered.  
  
Lucius nodded, and turned to leave when he suddenly caught sight of the portrait on Draco's wall. Suddenly, he turned pale. He knew what it was, but it couldn't be! It simply couldn't! But what if it was? His eyes narrowed. No prophecy was going to stand between him and his plans. If the prophecy was true, then the girl would simply have to die. A plan formulated in his mind. His mouth curved up deviously, and he swept out of the room.  
  
Disclaimer: these characters do not belong to me, they belong to J.K. Rowling. I just own the plot. 


	19. le pouvoir de la coeur the po...

K, this is a really short chapter, but since I've just added two chapter today, I didn't think you guys would mind. This one's just a piece of fluff, considering the depressiveness in the two earlier chapters. It thought couple needed a break.  
  
Chapter 19: le pouvoir de la coer (the power of the heart)  
  
The moment his father left, Draco reached out for Hermione, however, she slapped his hand back. Hard.  
  
"Hermione, what..."  
  
"D...d..don't touch me! Don't you dare ever come near me again!" With that, Hermione ran for the door. However, Draco was quicker. In a few short strides he had blocked her path and closed the door. He had also grabbed onto her shoulders, trying to draw her to him. She struggled. She pummeled him with her fists but unsurprisingly, she didn't hurt him. Her blows were too soft, and she was already overcome by tears.  
  
"Let go of me you..you bastard! Let me go!' She cried.  
  
"Hermione I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Draco whispered into her ear. Her struggles weakened, but her tears continued to flow.  
  
"Nnn..No your...not...You're not ...sssorry. You don't love me, .sssso wwwhy ..wwould you bbbee sorry? Please Draco, just let me go!"  
  
"I can't." He cried out, astonished by the honesty of his words.  
  
"Why not, damn you. Why can't you. Is it because I'm 'the only girl staying over this summer?' Is it because you enjoyed me when you 'visited me last night?' " she asked, using his father's words to taunt him.  
  
"Damn it Hermione! It's not like that!" Draco shouted.  
  
"Are you sure Draco? From the way you acted just now, it is exactly like that!" Hermione screamed, hurt and love tearing her apart.  
  
"It's not just lust!" Draco ground out, hardly believing himself.  
  
"What else is it?" Hermione asked, all the while cursing herself for feeling a flutter of hope.  
  
"I..I like talking to you. I like knowing that you're safe. I can't stop myself from smiling when I see you blush. I can't sleep if you're not in the same room with me. Hermione, trust me, there's much more." Draco listed, knowing that they weren't what Hermione wanted to hear.  
  
"But not enough for you to protect me. Not enough for you to do anything when your father treated me like a common prostitute. Not enough.."  
  
He kissed her. It was a soft hesitant kiss at first. He tenderly traced her lips with his tongue, before plunging in. He was gentler than he had ever been before. He didn't try to take control as he explored her mouth. When he finally ended it, he pulled her gently to him. He rested one hand on her head and smoothed her hair, as if he was calming a child. Then he kissed her forehead.  
  
"I'm sorry Hermione. I wish there was more I could offer you, but I can't. This..this will have to do."  
  
Hermione buried her head into his chest, trying to absorb some warmth; some indication that what she was doing was worth enduring. But she knew that her mind was fighting a loosing battle against her heart. She loved him. She loved him desperately enough to be willing to take only what he was willing to offer. No matter how many times he broke her heart, she would always be willing to forgive him. But dear god, she needed so much for him to love her back.  
  
"One loved with all her heart,  
  
Knowing that it could not be,  
  
One tore this love apart,  
  
Too blind, too proud to see."  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in my story, J.K. Rowlings does. I'm just borrowing them to try out my creative juices. Please don't sue me. 


	20. Un jour parfait a perfect d...

^^ indicates that it is writing^^  
  
Chapter 20: Un jour parfait. (a perfect day)  
  
^^ 4 days ago, I fell in love. No one had ever told me that love was such a tormenting feeling, especially if the person you love doesn't love you back. However, I understand why some angels once chose to spend a day as a mortal rather than an eternity in heaven. Although I have never felt as hurt as I have during the entirety of my life as I have in these past 4 days, I have also never felt as cherished and as content before either. The person I love, is Draco Malfoy.  
  
I don't know exactly why I'm writing this. I just woke up last night, in his arms, and was gripped by this terrible fear that once I die, people are going to forget about me. I don't mind if they forget about the rest of my life, but I don't want them to forget these 4 days. Strangely, I feel almost certain that there won't be many more. I would be willing to trade my soul for a single day with him where we could forget everything' who he is, who I am, whether or not he loves me, and just enjoy each other's company for a full day. There is nothing I wouldn't give for a day like that. ^^  
  
"Are you serious?"  
  
Hermione quickly covered her diary and glared at Draco.  
  
"This is private!" She scolded.  
  
He lifted an eyebrow mockingly, but his eyes were full of worry.  
  
"Hermione, no offence, but that reads like a suicide note." He commented.  
  
"I am NOT going to kill myself!"  
  
"I know that, but I don't like the sound of it. Accept for the last part. I repeat, are you serious?"  
  
"about?"  
  
"Spending a completely carefree day with me."  
  
"yes.in fact.I am."  
  
"Why?"  
  
Hermione was silent. She couldn't tell him the truth. What she really felt was that he, not she, was going to need the memory of such a day. She had a feeling, a premonition, that soon, she wasn't going to be there for him when he needed her.  
  
"Lets go Hogsmeade tomorrow." Draco said after Hermione remained silent for a while.  
  
"You don't have to indulge me you know." She answered.  
  
"I'm not indulging you. I want to go." He affirmed.  
  
"What about what your father said about being discreet." She reminded him.  
  
"I don't care what he said." He argued.  
  
"I don't believe you."  
  
"Hermione."  
  
"Yes."  
  
"You once told me that the heart and mind are separate things right?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"what does your heart say?"  
  
_____________________________________________________________________  
  
Hermione was beginning to understand why exactly she had fallen for Draco Malfoy. Before this, her feelings for him were irrational; she could make sense of them. She just knew that she loved him, she just was simply unable to hate him; unable to not forgive him. Now, she was beginning to understand why?  
  
Draco was simply the first person who had ever "taken care" of her. With her parents, Hermione had often felt the other way round. Her maturity and intelligence had made them depend upon her opinions, allowed her to make decisions, and take her advice. The fact was that she was so responsible and independent that they ahd stopped feeling the need to take care of her long time since. They had treated her more as an equal, a friend, and with her mother, sometimes the roles were reversed. They never pampered her; they never worried about her. As liberating as this trust was, it made her feel as if she was carrying this great burden to do everything right, to come up with the solutions, to fix what was wrong. Most important of all, it lacked to security of knowing that someone cared.  
  
It was little different with Harry and Ron. She was always taking care of them, saving them when they made stupid decisions, knowing the answers when they were in trouble. Consequently, she couldn't blame them for never really taking care of her, never actually putting a foot down and ordering her to do something that was in her best interest to do. The fact was, they had never really seen through her "know-it-all/I can take care of myself façade" that she had erected around herself since she was a child.  
  
Draco was different. With him, it seemed as though that façade didn't even exist. He saw her problems and he knew immediately that she couldn't take care of herself. Furthermore, he actually took the initiative to try to solve them for her. Yes, this is due partially simply because he was in the right place at the right time, but a large part of it is simply due to his character. Draco wouldn't take no for an answer, he never saw things at face value, and he never allowed things to solve themselves. In this respect he was like her, but his self-confidence and maturity was genuine while hers was a cover for her vast insecurities. He made it his prerogative to take care of her, and that was more than anyone had ever done.  
  
And now, on their first date, this aspect of him was presenting itself with much force. By the time she finished breakfast, Draco had already squeezed out a permission slip from Snape and had already arranged for one of the castle carriages to take them to Hogsmeade. Before leaving, he had made sure that Hermione was warm enough and that she didn't forget anything. Nobody had ever done that for her, ever! During the carriage ride, she didn't have to be the one starting conversations and making sure that he was comfortable. It was the other way round.  
  
At Hogsmeade, he asked HER where she wanted to go, what she wanted to do, where she wanted to eat, and what she wanted to buy. When she said that it was up to him, he made an effort to take her to places he thought she would like. He took her to the book store rather than the quiddich shop (like Harry usually did), and he took her to a shop full of strange charms and ancient amulets rather than a joke shop (like ron usually did). When they ate, he pulled her chair out for her. When then entred a shop he opened the door for her. With him, she felt protected and pampered, and it felt good. It felt wonderful.  
  
Draco was having the time of his life as well. He had been on dates before, but he never felt this much at ease. Hermione didn't look bored when he discussed politics with her, she was witty enough to make him laugh at the absurdities of the wizarding world, and she didn't just accept a statement simply because HE said it. She had a mind of her own, opinions of her own, and she was intelligent enough to be able to back up all her claims. She didn't argue for the sake of arguing and she didn't just simper and bow down to all opinions either.  
  
More importantly, however, with Hermione, Draco felt appreciated and needed. She didn't have any expectations for him and he could see that she appreciated it every time he went out of his way to do something nice for her. It was in her eyes, the way she lighted up simply by him pulling out her chair, as if these common courtesies were gifts rather than obligations he owed to her. This made him go out of his way to make her happy, to make her eyes sparkle, to make her face brighten with a smile. After a while, he found that he was enjoying making her happy as much as she. In fact, he was having the best time of his life simply trying to do just that.  
  
__________________________________________________________________  
  
"Hermione?"  
  
"Hmmm"  
  
"Are you sleeping?"  
  
"Hmmmm"  
  
"Can we talk."  
  
Hermione opened her eyes and snuggled closer to Draco. She didn't really want to. Today was a truly perfect day, with both of them having as good a time as the other, but she was rather certain that Draco would somehow spoil it by whatever he was going to say.  
  
"Hermione?"  
  
She sighed and looked up at him. Well, no day was perfect.  
  
"What my father said..."  
  
"He said a lot of things Draco. None of them were pleasant. Do we have to talk about him?"  
  
"Yes, because.well..Just listen alright?"  
  
Hermione waited.  
  
"Well, what he said about me marrying someone of equal consequence.."  
  
Hermione winced, but she kept silent. The idea of Draco marrying someone else hurt her deeply, despite the illusions she didn't have about their relationship.  
  
"I need you to know this.."  
  
"Draco.please don't.." he put a finger on her lips, quieting her.  
  
"The life time I'll spend with her will never be as important to me as this single day we spent together." With that he closed her eyes.  
  
Hermione felt tears of joy fill her eyes. This was a perfect day indeed.  
  
Disclaimer: these characters do not belong to me, they belong to J.K. Rowling. I just own the plot. 


	21. la dangere danger

Happy New Year guys. I know I've been remiss in my writing, but, well, I had college apps to do and I procrastinated big time. Any ways, here's the next chapter. Umm.and I apologize for the turn of events..sniff.no real way around it.  
  
Chapter 21: La dangère - danger  
  
"It can't be true" Hermione said, as she shook her head. Her legs gave way but Draco caught her. She stared at Professor Dumbledore, begging him with her eyes to tell her that it was all a joke.  
  
"I'm sorry Ms. Granger, it's true. Your parents are dead." Professor Dumbledore said sadly.  
  
"But....How? How can they both be dead? They don't even live together anymore. They're separated." Hermione rambled. It couldn't be true. It just couldn't!  
  
"Ms. Granger. Please, ..I'm so sorry" It was Professor McGonagal, but Hermione's head was still reeling. She didn't understand.  
  
Draco swore under his breath. Yesterday had been so perfect, but now, now Hermione looked as if se was ready to die that very moment. Herface was pale, her eyes full of unshed tears, she looked as if she was going to break. And he couldn't let her.  
  
"Professors, why don't you leave Hermione with me for a while. I think she needs some time.."  
  
"I would like to, Mr. Malfoy, but the letter says that she is to go immediately back to her house. She is the only living relative, and she needs to see to their funeral." Professor Snape said, his voice a little too curt. Draco frowned, what was the hurry? He sensed that something was wrong, but what?  
  
"Of course professor, I'll..I wish to go immediately." Hermione murmured, as if in a daze.  
  
"Hermione, wait...I think" Draco protested. But he saw the look in her eyes. Nothing was going to stop her.  
  
"A carriage will be leaving in an hour Ms. Granger." It was Professor Snape again. This time, even Dumbldore frowned.  
  
"Snape, I don't remember ordering any carriages." He said.  
  
"I took the initiative headmaster. It was prudent." Snape answered.  
  
"Don't worry professor, I'll be ready."  
  
"No." Draco almost shouted.  
  
"Mr. Malfoy?" this time it was Professor Mcgonagal.  
  
"I mean, Hermione can not possibly travel back to London in her present condition Professor, it simply isn't safe." Draco explained in a calmer voice.  
  
"Of course, Hagrid will.."  
  
"I have a sudden wish to visit my parents, professors, perhaps I could accompany Hermione, as well as Hagrid."  
  
"But.."  
  
"Its alright professor McGonagal, certainly Mr. Malfoy should accompany Ms. Granger" Snape answered, making Draco frown even more.  
  
He knew that if there was any danger, Snape would not let him go. However, his over-eagerness to comply made Draco even more suspicious. Something was wrong, but Draco didn't know what.  
  
When the train pulled to a stop, Draco caught Hermione's hand, stopping her from barging straight out. Hermione was too upset to react. Hagrid was the first to leave the compartment, followed by Hermione, with Draco watching her back. Hermione noticed their caution, but she didn't understand it. She was still trying to figure out how BOTH of her parents could be killed in the SAME car crash if they were separated.  
  
"Hermione, watch out" Hagrid screamed, before a curse hit him. He fell forward. Draco lunged forward, wand in hand, while Hermione ran to Hagrid. He was dead. She saw Draco freeze. She grabbed for her wand, but then darkness enveloped her. The last thing she saw was Lucius Malfoy.  
  
Disclaimer: No, I don't own these characters. I wanted them for a christmas present, but well..i think they're too valuble. Anyway, sorry for this chapter being so short, didn't really have that much time. I'll try to make the next ones longer. 


	22. pas de choix no choice

Well, can't concentrate on college apps. Really, no idea why I wanted to go to that university in the first place. Anyway, since I do NOT know what is on the 217th page of my autobiography, here's the next chapter.  
  
Chapter 22: pas de choix - no choice  
  
Hermione slowly opened her eyes. She tried to move, but couldn't. A curse was binding her. She opened her mouth and said the first thing that came to her mind.  
  
"Draco?"  
  
"It seems, my son, that the Mudblood is awake" Hermione tried to turn her head, but was unsuccessful. Thankfully, she saw both Lucius and Draco Malfoy move into her line of vision. She didn't like the look on Draco's face.  
  
"Then, father, you should say what you intended to say. What do you want."  
  
"I don't like the insolence in your voice Draco."  
  
"I don't like you kidnapping my. . .friend....without telling me why either." Draco snapped. He had spent that past few hours in silence, with Lucius refusing to reveal his motives without Hermione. Lucius patience was rare, and when it was present, it meant that Lucius knew he was holding the upper hand.  
  
Hermione's eyebrows furrowed. Why was Draco standing with his father? Why wasn't he helping her?  
  
"Release her from the curse father, she can do no harm without her wand."  
  
Lucius mouth quirked in to a smile, but he did as he was bid. Draco's worry increased. Lucius was acting strangely, and he didn't like it. Hermione ran to Draco, and he pulled her to him instinctively. His father frowned. "Your affection for her is too obvious Draco. You need to hide better." He raised his wand...  
  
"Is that why you killed Hagrid and kidnapped me? Just to tell Draco that his affection is too obvious?" Hermione asked. Trying to direct Lucius' anger towards her. It worked.  
  
"Crucio"  
  
Draco braced himself for the pain, and when he didn't feel it, his blood ran cold. Hermione was writhing, biting her lip so no sound came out. Draco reached for his own wand, only to find that it wasn't there. He glared at his father, planning to leap up and wring his neck.  
  
"Finite Incantatem." Lucius announced. Hermione's body went slack. Draco hugged her to him, trying to absorb her pain. He didn't take his eyes of Lucius, knowing that the curse was not the only thing he had planned.  
  
"That, girl, is a lesson in humility." Lucius said. " I would have continued, but there are more important things to do."  
  
"Like what, father?" Draco hissed through his teeth.  
  
"Like making sure that the prophecy isn't fulfilled. And the only way that can be done, son, is by making sure that YOU kill her."  
  
Disclaimer: Again, this doesn't belong to me.it belongs to J.K rowlings.  
  
laughs. Well, since everyone was predicting the Lucius would kill Hermione, I decided to give the story a bit of a twist. Well, I hope you want to read on.cuz, you know what to do right. My self esteem is low, my college apps aren't done, and I'm really depressed. Only one thing can cheer me up. REVIEW! 


	23. Pour le pouvoir for the power

Well, I finally got to use the computer. (My mother had this research thingie due and she hogged it for the past couple of days......well, she's back at work and I finally have the comp..) Sorry for not updating sooner, I knew I left it off at an ...Hmmm...awkward place, and I know the last chapter was really short, and I guess you guys want to know the rest of the story, so well....here goes.  
  
Chapter 23: Pour le pouvoir - for the power  
  
Draco stared at his father. After a moment, he laughed. Hermione winced. Even through the haze of pain she was still under, she noticed that Draco's laugh was bitter. He usually laughed this way when he wanted to hide a weakness from her, and now he was trying to hide his fear for his father. She tried to touch his arm, but she could barely move. The after effects of the Cruciatus curse was wearing down on her. She knew that she wouldn't be able to remain conscious much longer.  
  
"What on Earth, father, gave you the idea that you could force me to do anything against my will?" Draco bit out between laughs. However, he knew that his father was serious. He had an extremely strong feeling that his father had orchestrated the death of Hermione's parents and Hagrid, and that unless Lucius was completely sure that he would have his way, he wouldn't have taken such a huge risk. Draco hugged Hermione's body closer to him. One thing that he was certain of was that there was no way in hell that his father could make him kill the girl he...Hermione.  
  
"Who said anything about it being against your will?" Lucius asked, his brow quirking. He was too calm, Draco thought, far too calm for his comfort.  
  
"I would never willingly kill ....a helpless girl. She has done nothing to deserve that."  
  
"Oh yes she has." Lucius said, his voice gentle, too gentle.  
  
"What?"  
  
"She has fallen in love with you."  
  
____________________________________________________________________________ __________________  
  
Draco stared at his father in silence. Finally, he asked  
  
"I am not going to kill her for that." He said, his voice as controlled as his father's. "neithe are you. This is my business father, it doesn't affect anyone else but me and Hermione. Back off!" he ground out as his father advanced toward them.  
  
"You're wrong, son, this has everything to do with me. In fact, your actions will affect whether or not your family will live past this day."  
  
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Draco shouted, as he moved to shield Hermione from his father.  
  
"We are vassals of the Dark Lord, Draco. Me, Your mother, and everyone you have known your entire life. If you refuse to kill this Mudblood girl, then you will be refusing to show your loyalty to the Dark Lord, and you will also be refusing to take your place by his side. He will kill us all if you do not kill her."  
  
"I have known that I would serve the Dark Lord every single day of my life. My loyalty has never been questioned. What does Hermione have to do with it? And why am I being tested now. I am not even a death eater yet?"  
  
"You are his heir Draco. "  
  
"What?"  
  
"you are the next heir of Slytherin."  
  
"How the hell did you come up with that conclusion? And what does that have to do with me killing Hermione?" Draco roared. He didn't understand himself. Why was he feeling so angry about this. Wasn't this what he always wanted? Since he was a child, he had wanted power; he had known that he would some day be greater than his father. It was want he wanted, and now kit was being handed to him on a platter. However, all he could feel as fear and rage. He didn't want to kill Hermione.  
  
"Come on Draco, you must have seen the signs. Have you not dreampt strange dreams, did you not see Aelfred Slytherin in your sleep? Did his portrait not appear in your room, was the prophecy not clear to your eyes? Kill her Draco, and embrace what is yours. You will be much greater than the Dark Lord ever was. He has foretold it."  
  
Draco's mind reeled. The dream, the portrait. What the heck did that fucking prophecy say. Why couldn't he remember?  
  
"You still haven't told me why I must kill her." Draco hissed. Hermione tried to stem her tears. She heard the hesitation in is voice. He was thinking about killing her. Why not? She was nothing to him. He didn't love her.  
  
"Have you not read the prophecy boy? You know why."  
  
"No, I have not given a damn about that prophecy. And I will do nothing until I understand."  
  
Lucius' eyes flickered. He knew his son was being swayed, but he didn't know how far. To his astonishment, as well as his son's, Hermione started speaking. Draco noticed that her voice sounded resigned, empty. Her breath was ragged, but she persisted, all the while holding Draco's hand.  
  
" For a Slytherin, you know very little of your history Draco. Aelfred Slytherin was a king in Medieval times, and he came by his position by making a choice.. To prove his allegiance to his lord, he took the life of the mother of his unborn child. After that act, he was given the power to conquer all the lands in Europe." After a while, Hermione turned to stare at Lucius Malfoy. Her next words dripped with malice. "He later killed his master, and took his power for his own."  
  
"It seems, Draco, that the Mudblood knows her fate." Lucius said.  
  
"I am not.."  
  
"It's not a choice Draco. Don't you understand, you don't have one."  
  
"Hermione, shut up. I am not going to kill you."  
  
"Oh yes Draco, you are." Hermione whispered. She was going to make him.  
  
Disclaimer: no, I don't own these characters. Gotta write the next chapter now, so that should suffice.  
  
  
  
"Trust me, there is not risk of that. I do not and will not love her." 


	24. Touez moi Kill me

I'm asking you guys to trust me. Whatever happens, in some twisted weird way, this story is going to have a sort off happy ending. I swear! Btw, this is NOT the last chapter. Trust me, please..  
  
Chapter 24: Touez-moi --- kill me (**author points desperately at the message above** - sighs)  
  
Lucius stared at the Muggle born girl he was asking his son to kill. She looked so resolute, so certain. Why was she acting this way? However, Lucius had risen to high positions by using his ability to correctly judge people, and he understood, then and there, that this girl was his ally.  
  
"Draco, I will leave you alone with your, .. , with this girl for an hour. When I return, I want to see her dead, do you understand me?"  
  
"Don't bother father, I am not going to kill her." Draco shouted, but he had wasted his breadth. Lucius was already leaving the room. Before the door closed, Lucius tossed in a knife. Draco caught it.  
  
____________________________________________________________________________ __________________  
  
Draco shifted to cradle Hermione in his arms. She looked so pale, so vulnerable. However, there was steel in her eyes, a certainty he had never seen before. She lifted her hand to touch his face.  
  
"Draco, ..can you promise me something?"  
  
"Look, Hermione, we need to find a way to get out of here. When my father comes back in an hour, he is going to want to see you dead. If he doesn't, he is going to kill you himself. "  
  
"Draco..can you listen, I don't have the energy to shout. I feel soo...tired."  
  
Draco painfully suppressed his anger. Why was she acting as if she was going to die? How could she think he was going to kill her? Didn't he show that he......that he cared for her? The very thought that she could believe him willing to kill her hurt him deeply. But this wasn't the time or place to rage. He needed to get her help, and fast.  
  
"Hermione, we need to get out of here."  
  
"Look around you Draco, do you see a way out? Neither of us have our wands, and I don't even have enough energy to sit up." Hermione said. She knew that she was being brutal, but there wasn't enough time.  
  
"What are you getting at Granger. Are you saying that I should kill you?" Draco hissed.  
  
"Yes."  
  
For a moment Draco thought his ears were fooling him. Then, he looked into Hermione's eyes and he knew that they were not. Her eyes were brimming with tears, but she didn't let them fall, and underneath, he saw a strength that he never thought existed in her. He bit down on his lower lip, his face paling.  
  
"What kind of person do you think I am Hermione? Do you believe me coward enough to kill you just to save my own hide? Damn it Hermione, I thought we knew each other better than that."  
  
"Draco..Listen! I didn't think you were going to kill me when your father told you to, and I know that even now, you don't want to." She said softly. "But you have to."  
  
"The hell I do Hermione."  
  
"Draco think! I'm not worth it."  
  
"What!?"  
  
"I'm not worth THIS."  
  
Draco stared at her, dumbfounded.  
  
"I am NOT going to have your life on my conscience. Your father killed my parents just to lure me out, and he killed Hagrid just to capture me. My life isn't worth the death of those three, and it is most certainly not worth the destruction of yours." Her voice was getting softer with every word she spoke. She knew that unconsciousness was going to take over her soon, so she hurried on.  
  
"Draco, listen to me. I saw it in your eyes just now. You are an ambitious person. You wanted the power and the glory the Dark Lord is offering you through my death, and if we didn't..become intimate the last couple of days, you wouldn't have hesitated to kill me. Are you going to deny that?"  
  
"I....Hermione, I'm not going to lie to you. I want that power more than I want life itself and yes, if this happened a month ago, I would have killed you. But that doesn't change anything. Power isn't worth your life, and I know that! I...."  
  
"What Draco?"  
  
"I care for you."  
  
Hermioen sighed. She felt the tears in her eyes threaten to fall out. She was going to die in less than an hour and he still couldn't say it. What did she expect? It wasn't true. He didn't love her.  
  
"And I love you. Do you understand that Draco Malfoy? I love you so much and I am not going to let my life stand between you and your dreams." She was crying now, but she needed to finish. Precious moments were passing by.  
  
"Hermione,...you're not."  
  
"Draco....I am. Even if we escape today, you are going to regret choosing me over your family for the rest of your life. You are going to forever wonder what your life would have been like if you made a different choice. You will look at me and remember that you caused the death of you family, that you threw your life away. I can't live with that Draco. Just seeing the conflict in your eyes is enough to break my heart."  
  
"Hermione....I won't. I don't blame you for this, this is my father's doing."  
  
"Draco, the only way anyone could forgive someone else for a sacrifice such as this would be if they loved that person, and even then, sometimes it isn't enough. You don't love me Draco, we aren't joined in that deep, final way. You won't be able to forgive this. You won't be able to forgive me."  
  
Draco stared into her tear-drenched face and he felt like he was being torn to shreds. What she said was true, but how could he live without her. How could he live with the memory of killing her?  
  
"Hermione, I won't, I can't kill you. I just can't. Damn it, why did it have to come to this?"  
  
Hermione reached out her hand to cover his, to cover the hand that was holding the knife. His hand was shaking, but he didn't move.  
  
"It couldn't have come out an other way." She whispered. He turned to face her, and she kissed him with all the love in her heart. She kissed him goodbye.  
  
"Draco, promise me..."  
  
"Anything darling."  
  
"Don't harden your heart. Don't turn to stone. "  
  
"Hermione..."  
  
"I forgive you for this. I forgive your father. I forgive the Dark Lord. "  
  
"Hermione.please.there has to be...  
  
"Drcao, promise me. Forgive yourself. We were never meant to be. Without you I would have died a long time ago. I would have killed myself. You gave me a pleasant dream, Draco, you gave me happiness. Don't blame yourself for this. My life isn't worth your vengeance, it isn't worth your hatred, it isn't worth your heart."  
  
Draco heard a key turn in the door's lock, but still, his hand didn't move.  
  
"Draco..promise me." Hermione whispered.  
  
With a curse Draco pulled her to him. He kissed her, he kissed her for what he knew to be the last time. Then he guided the knife to her heart, and plunged in, swift and deep, willing her to feel no pain. When he looked down, she was smiling. He closed her eyes. She thought he had promised.  
  
"I'm sorry darling. I can't forgive them for this. You can forgive me, but I will never forgive myself."  
  
Disclaimer: No, I don't own them, they don't belong to me. Both of them were created by Ms. Rowlings.  
  
sniffs...cries...Noooooooooo. This is NOT the end. Read and review. 


	25. Je ne peux pas oublier i can't forge...

Yes, well, ummm.sorry for killing Hagrid. Didn't really have a choice. I'm just writing this to get rid of my writer's block. I'm starting to regret promising that this will have a happy ending, but I well, (consider me, I read the end of books before the beginning just to make sure that the story has a happy ending. No happy ending, me no read.) sympathize, and yes, I really couldn't leave off like this. Don't you just hate it when it takes her death to make Draco call her Darling?Seriously, I'm beginning to not like him anymore. Ideas, I deas..Mount holyoke application, no concentrate, grr..  
  
By the way, this was, again, inspired by some novel written by Elizabeth Lowell. I don't know which one, but as I wrote, I started getting the feeling that I was writing very much like her, so although it was unconscious, I would like to acknowledge her influence.  
  
Chapter 25:  
  
"Mr. Malfoy, are you asking me to believe that both Hagrid's and Ms. Granger's death were accidents? Do you think me stupid?" Professor Dumbledore shouted, and for one of the few times in his life, he lost his grip on his temper.  
  
"You don't seem to have evidence to prove me false, Headmaster, you heard my son's testimony." Lucius Malfoy answered calmly.  
  
"Hagrid died of an unforgivable curse and Ms. Granger has a knife wound through her heart. Isn't that evidence enough?"  
  
"As I said, Hagrid mistakenly attacked me and I defended myself. Ms. Granger fell on a knife."  
  
"That's a lie and you know it."  
  
"Prove it." With that, Lucius stood up and whisked out of the room. Draco moved to follow him.  
  
"Draco, you will stay here for a while and answer my questions." Dumbledore said in a cold voice.  
  
Draco stopped and turned around. His face was a mask, his eyes were cold. Professor Dumbledore heart sank, he had seen that look before. It was the same look Tom Riddle had whenever he talked about his parents. It was a look of someone whose heart was broken, someone who had lost his soul.  
  
"I've told you what you needed to know, Headmaster." Draco said. His voice was dry, empty. It was as if he didn't care any longer.  
  
"You haven't told me the truth Draco." Dumbledore said.  
  
"Does it matter Professor? At this moment, there is nothing either of us can do." Draco's voice was tinged with bitterness. At least it was an emotion, Professor Dumbledore thought.  
  
"Both of us know that it wasn't an accident, Mr. Malfoy. Whoever killed her needs to pay."  
  
Then kill me, Draco thought, remembering what happened. Kill me and put me out of my misery.  
  
"Mr. Malfoy?"  
  
"Don't worry Headmaster, one day, they will pay. I will make them pay, even if I have to die doing it." Draco vowed. Yes, he would follow the path paved for him. He would become greater than the Dark Lord, and then, father or no, he would make them pay!  
  
Suddenly, Professor Dumbledore got up, and put an arm around Draco's shoulders. Soothingly, he said....  
  
"Are you sure that's what Hermione would have wanted of you?"  
  
No! Damn it, he knew that she wouldn't have wanted this. But he didn't have anything left. If he let go of this vengeance, this anger, there would be nothing left inside of him. Nothing left for him to feel. He never knew how much of his heart depended on seeing her each day; he never knew that without her he would feel so empty; he never knew that he.....  
  
"Draco, talk about it...leave this burden to others. Don't do this to yourself."  
  
Draco stared numbly at Professor Dumbledore. What choice did he have? If he told, Professor Dumbledore would seek legal action, and that would bring him nothing. He knew the extent of his father's control over the Ministry of Magic. He knew that the power of the Dark Lord now reached Azkaban. He knew that the only way he could win was by being part of the Dark Force, selling his soul to the Dark Lord, and then reaping his revenge from within. It would take time, but there was no other way. Besides, he no longer had a soul. His soul died with Hermione.  
  
Professor Dumbledore' grip tightened.  
  
"Draco, have you noticed the portrait in your room?"  
  
Draco's face hardened, it was that damn portrait that caused him to have to kill Hermione! It was that damn prophecy that destroyed his life!  
  
"listen to me Draco. You do not want to walk in the footsteps of Aelfred Slytherin. Do you hear me?"  
  
Draco stared at the Professor, his eyes steely.  
  
"It seems professor, that no one has seen fit to give me that choice. Not even Hermione."  
  
"Draco! Aelfred Slytherin may have been one of the most powerful wizards in the world, but he had no soul. All his life he was an empty carcass, consumed by anger and hatred. He died alone, and had his bride not accepted the fruit of his sins for him, he would have forever walked the Earth in chains. The more sins you have in this life, the more Hermione will suffer. Do you want that?"  
  
"What the hell are you talking about? Hermione is dead!' Draco roared, but for the first time since he plunged the knife into Hermione's heart, he felt something other than hate. He couldn't bear it if Hermione was going to suffer in death as well as in life. She didn't deserve it!  
  
"Not quite Draco. Because of a promise made long ago, her soul will be forever caught between heaven and earth. She will forever weep for what could have been. She will be surrounded by whispers she could not hear, by pain she can not bear. And until someone takes her place, there she will there forever remain, until the end of time, so that you soul will not be damned to hell."  
  
"Don't talk riddles Professor. What does this mean? Why is this happening to her? If the sins are mine, then I'll take the consequences for it. Hermione has done nothing!" Draco felt his heart sink at those words. It wasn't true. It couldn't be.  
  
"Didn't you read the prophecy in your room, Draco. You knew this would happen."  
  
"Why does everyone pay so much f***ing attention to a bunch of words written on a portrait. Tell me how I can help Hermione."  
  
"Forgive, Draco. Knowing her, I know she asked that of you."  
  
"You knew! You knew what was going to happen didn't you. You knew my father was going to force me to kill Hermione. Why didn't you stop him? Why didn't you do something about it?"  
  
Dumbledore sighed. He sank down on into his chair.  
  
"I know what happened centuries ago Draco, and a I knew that it would be repeated. I didn't know the specifics, the hows, the whens and whats. I didn't know enough to stop it."  
  
Draco was silent. Then he remembered.  
  
"It said that I can buy back her life."  
  
"Draco, let it go."  
  
"It said that I can go to heaven's gate and buy back her life. If everything in the prophecy has been true so far, then this must be as well. Tell me how."  
  
"Draco, its too late. That was metaphorical. No one can bring back the dead. No one can make her heart beat once more."  
  
"Then what's the point of having the f***ing prophecy? What's the point of you telling me this?"  
  
Draco felt tears coming to his eyes but he forced them back. Tears weren't going to solve his problems, they weren't going to bring Hermione back. Even in her death, she would suffer. What had she ever done but love him?  
  
"Draco, you can't change the past. Let go of your hate, allow life to take its course."  
  
"If I let go of this, I might as well be dead. There is nothing left in me."  
  
"Draco.."  
  
They both sat in silence for a long while. There was nothing either of them could say. The trap had been sprung centuries ago, and there was no way that Draco could fight free from it. Unless..  
  
"Tell me what happened"  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"Tell me why Hermione must pay for my sins. Tell me why she can't go to heaven and for once in her life have happiness. Tell me what happened centuries ago. Tell me how I can bring her back!"  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, Ms. Rowlings owns them  
  
*sniff* poor Draco. Please read and review. Tell me what you think. I hope this makes a happy ending more conceivable. 


	26. Ce n'est pas un choix that is not a cho...

Thanks Anime for the idea. I might use it in another story (if I ever write one that is) but I already wrote chapter 25 by the time I got to read you review. To whom it may concern, that was a wonderful poem, I really loved it. Jase, calm down, its just a story. All the ppl crying after chapter 24, I apologize, it had to happen. Actually, your responses made me decide against ending it there. I am still trying desperately to come up with a happy ending. I hope you like this chapter. Read and Review.  
  
Chapter 26: Ce n'est pas un choix - that is not a choice Draco knew that he was grasping at straws, but he didn't have a choice. He knew that if let it go, if he lost hope for bringing Hermione back, he would become exactly what Dumbledore feared he would be. A man without a heart, a man without a soul, just a carcass with only rage and hatred, someone Hermione thought he promised he would never be. Draco waited, staring intently at the headmaster, hoping desperately that the past would give him a key out of the trap that had been sprung centuries abo.  
  
"I don't know the details Draco, most of it has been obscured by time. All I know is that the witch the prophecy called 'Slytherin's Bride' was in fact, Aelfred Slytherin's mistress. To prove his loyalty to his master, who also happened to be his father-in-law, Aelfred killed her and her unborn child. This witch, whose name was Amber, was a true seer. From the moment she met and fell in love with Aelfred Slytherin, she knew what her fate would be. She knew that she would be killed by his hand. However, she also foresaw that not long after her death, Aelfred Slytherin would be killed by the same master he sought to please. All seers live by a code Draco, a code telling them never to use their power to change the future. However, for love, Amber died casting a protection spell, a similar one to the one protecting Harry Potter from Voldemort. As a result of her spell, Aelfred Slytherin's master died trying to kill him, and Aelfred became one of the most ruthless rulers in wizarding history. Aelfred killed millions of people, muggle and mage, on his quest to rule the world, and in his power, he killed even more. Because all this was the result of Amber's abuse of her power, she was damned to forever live in a mystical forest, a place between heaven and earth. A place where the whispering of the trees would remind her of her lost love, a place where the souls of the dead would torment her with pain. It is said that she would remain there, forever seeing and never truly dying, until someone takes her place. Someone who also causes the rise of Slytherin's heir, someone who died because of his inability to love."  
  
"So that someone is Hermione." Draco said. A statement, not a question.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"And because she died to start me on my road to power, she too will forever weep and never die, in this living hell between heaven and earth."  
  
"Yes"  
  
"And there is nothing I can do about it."  
  
"Yes"  
  
"There is no way I can save her from this fate."  
  
"She will always be there Draco, she will always be haunted by the memories of what could have been. But if you choose, here and now, not to walk in your predecessor's footsteps, you will not add to her pain. She will not have to suffer from the millions of souls you will kill on your way."  
  
"No."  
  
'Draco"  
  
"No!" His fist hit the table in a crash. Blood dripped from his knuckles. He didn't feel any pain.  
  
"Draco, you have a choice. Either let this go, or add to the pain she already suffers."  
  
"That is not a choice." His fist hit the table again. Again he saw blood. Again he felt nothing. Dumbledore rose to stop him, but then sank back down. He saw the black hell in Draco's eyes. Draco stood up, his fists clenched to his sides. Suddenly, the door opened. It was Professor McGonagall.  
  
"Headmaster."  
  
"Not now Minerva."  
  
"It's Ms. Granger's parents Headmaster. They aren't dead. The letter was a sent as a.." She looked a Draco. "As a mistake."  
  
Professor Dumbledore slumped back into his chair. He saw Draco's face, and he wished to Merlin that he would never have to see such pain in anyone's face again.  
  
"May I be excused Headmaster?"  
  
"Draco."  
  
"May I go" Draco said through clenched teeth.  
  
"Yes Mr. Malfoy, you may leave."  
  
____________________________________________________________________________ __  
  
Draco maintained his composure until he reached his room. Then he saw Hermione's diary on the writing desk, her books strewn haphazardly around the room, her clothes lying on the bed. He let out a pained beast- like roar as he let his anger overcome him. He heard the table crash into the wall. He saw the shelves fall down, he saw pages ripped asunder. He saw his own blood flow as he pounded on everything in front of him. Still, he felt no pain. He felt nothing. 


	27. Entre mondes between worlds

Chapter 27: Entre mondes - between worlds  
  
It wasn't long before Draco was drained of his strength. Whatever he did, he couldn't make himself feel anything but his rage and hatred for his father, his contempt for himself. He was beginning to understand why, not so long ago, Hermione had cut herself almost to the point of incurring her own death. It was a relief to feel pain, to concentrate all the hurt on a cut, a bruise, or a broken limb. It was much better than focusing on the emptiness within one's self, the utter loss and despair that now occupied his own heart. He rescued Hermione from that void, only to kill her less than a week later. She told him to forgive himself. But he couldn't. No one could. As he slumped down amongst the remnants of what used to be his room's furniture, he found himself staring at the portrait of Aelfred Slytherin. The golden words were still there, taunting him, mocking him.  
  
~^~ Tears wept,  
  
for a love  
  
that never could have been,  
  
Tears wept,  
  
for a tragedy,  
  
long ago foreseen. ~^~  
  
Yes, he knew that his relationship with Hermione was doomed from the start. That was why he pushed her away, again and again, only to find himself loosing the internal battle, only to find himself pulling her back into his arms. He knew that one day they would have been parted, but he didn't think that it would have been this soon, he didn't think that he would be the one to kill her.  
  
~^~ The tragedy of a sorceress,  
  
Whose heart knew naught of hate,  
  
Who deserved to have been blessed,  
  
But was cursed by wretched fate. ~^~  
  
Draco closed his eyes, only to see Hermione's face just before she died. She was smiling. She looked so innocent, so content. She thought that he had promised. She believed that he would be able to let his hatred go. But Oh how wrong was she. Even now, knowing that every sin he made would be paid by her suffering, knowing that she would bear the consequences of his actions, he could not let it go. He could not forgive his father, the Dark Lord, or himself. He could not forgive for he might as well lie down and die this instant if that were to be asked of him. He couldn't go on, not without a reason to live. Not without her.  
  
~^~ The life of his love will be bought,  
  
From the Slytherin's Bride at heaven's gate ~^~  
  
With the remainder of his strength, Draco got up and threw a bloody fist at the portrait with all his might. Smearing the golden words with his blood.  
  
Thwack!  
  
"Give her back to me! " he roared as he threw his other fist at it, bloodying the portrait even more.  
  
Thwack!  
  
"I want to see her again!"  
  
The blood stains had caused the picture to grow somewhat hazy, as if it were disappearing.  
  
Thwack!  
  
"Take me to her. "  
  
The image grew even lighter.  
  
Thwack!  
  
"Dammit. I can't live like this. I can't live without her."  
  
With those words, Draco fell down, his body shacking with tears he refused to shed. He felt darkness overcome him, the sweet lure of unconsciousness just beyond his reach.  
  
He didn't notice that Aelfred Slytherin's image had now disappeared. He didn't notice that what was left was the picture of a dark eerie forest. He didn't notice that from the image came a light. A light that was now enveloping his body, and taking him where he wished to go.  
  
_________________________________________________________________  
  
He was dreaming, Draco thought to himself as he got up. It was the same dream he had the night he made Hermione his. Would he find her here as he did before? Of course not. Dead people do not dream.  
  
He remembered this place well. It was here that he first heard the prophecy. Everything was dark, except for an illuminated tree in the center. But the light was less bright now, as if dimmed by time and sorrow. Like before, there were no sounds, no whispering of the wind brushing through the trees, no chirping of birds, no rustling, just complete eerie silence.  
  
Against his better judgment, Draco called out Hermione's name. He did not see her, but he sensed that she was there, in the dark silence, just beyond his reach. His shouted until his voice was hoarse, until his throat stung from his exertions, until he lost hope. Suddenly, he saw her, standing just within his reach. A shadow, lighter than a flame, but definitely Hermione. She was crying. Her sorrow, if not her body, was almost tangible in the still air. He grabbed for her, but then she was no longer there. He felt something pulling him back; something telling him to leave this realm. He resisted. Hermione was here. She was in pain. She needed him.  
  
"Hermione! Don't hide yourself from me." Draco cried, willing her to appear.  
  
For a long while, nothing happened. Again Draco felt that tug, again he resisted. He didn't care if he couldn't see her. She was there, and for now, that was enough.  
  
Disclaimer: No I don't own these characters. J.K Rowlings does. 


	28. Je t'aime I love you

Chapter 28: Je t'aime - I love you  
  
Draco searched the fen. He ran madly through the trees, called out for Hermione in the dark night, willing her to appear. However, he got no response. Wherever he ran, whatever direction he took, the path led him back to the rowan: The DeadTree that held this world together. Draco could feel his connection to the world of the living diminishing with every breath he took; he knew that soon, he would not be able to return. But how could go back without Hermione? At least here, although he can not see her face or touch her skin, he felt her presence - crying silently in the night, weeping for a love that cold not be.  
  
Finally, exhausted, Draco rested his back on the Dark rowan. From the moment the ancient bark touched his skin, Draco understood what Dumbledore told him about Hermione's suffering - being tormented by memories and loss. Swiftly, the pain rushed through him, words and deeds he couldn't remember, but were his nonetheless.  
  
__________________________________________________________________  
  
~ You know why you are here Hell witch. Tell me of my end? ~  
  
^ It will aid you not. Tis for fate to decide how you will die.^  
  
~Tell me what you know, or die by my hand.~  
  
^One day Dark Warrior, I will. But now is not the time.^  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~####~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
~Have you bewitched me, seer? What curse has made me thus?~  
  
^How are you?^  
  
~Desire coursing through my veins. The need to have you outweighing what I must do.~  
  
^No curse could make you that way.^  
  
~It must have. There is no other way.~  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~####~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
~Never leave my sight again.~  
  
^Why?^  
  
~You're are mine.~  
  
^My heart may be yours, but not my body, not my soul.^  
  
~The former will change in an hour. The latter not long after.~  
  
^But what of your body, your heart, your soul?^  
  
~You will have my body, and that is more than enough.~  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~####~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
^Let me go.^  
  
~I will not.~  
  
^Will not or can not?^  
  
~I told you once. You are mine.~  
  
^Let me go Dark Warrior. You are killing me, one breath at a time.^  
  
~No~  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~####~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
~You foresaw this day~  
  
^Aye.^  
  
~You knew that you would die by my hand.~  
  
^There could never be another way.^  
  
~There must be.~  
  
^Your ambition outweighs whatever feelings you have for me. It outweighs your desire.^  
  
~Stop me. Find a way out of this trap.~  
  
^I can not^  
  
~Why?~  
  
^For that, Dark Warrior, love is required. There is no love in you, Aelfred of Syltherin. You have already made your choice.^  
  
~Will you ever forgive me?~  
  
^I already have^  
  
__________________________________________________________________  
  
"Draco"  
  
"Hermione" He said as he rose, scanning the space in front of him for signs of her.  
  
"Draco, you must leave this place. "  
  
"Where are you?"  
  
"Leave Draco, it's too dangerous for you. "  
  
"Show yourself to me. I need to see you."  
  
Slowly, ever so slowly, a form began to take shape in front of him. Hermione was staring at him, with eyes that were far too dark and a face that was far too pale. Her body more fragile than flame. Draco reached out to touch her, but she moved out of his grasp.  
  
"Please Draco. You are slipping too far into this realm. This place is not for you, go back! There is nothing here but pain."  
  
"There is you, and that is all I need. Touch me darling. I won't hurt you."  
  
Hermione backed further away as Draco advanced towards her. Finally, there was nowhere for her to run.  
  
"You don't think you will hurt me, but you will. You will bring back to me the pain of what we had lost. I can't bear it Draco. Not here, not anymore."  
  
"Hermione, I never meant to hurt you." Draco said as his hand caressed her cheek. She winced, biting down tears, memories flowing through her, tearing at the scars in her heart.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~####~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"I didn't mean to kiss you this afternoon."  
  
"You seemed pretty sure to me."  
  
"Well, it was a mistake."  
  
"I see."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~####~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
" I just want to make sure that you're not expecting more than I can give."  
  
"I don't expect anything."  
  
"I don't love you. I want you. But it isn't love"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~####~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"If we do this. It'll never be the same again."  
  
"I know"  
  
" You won't be able to forget this. You won't be able to just let it go."  
  
"I will, and I'll break your heart doing it."  
  
"What about yours?"  
  
"I don't have one."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~####~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"You don't love me."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~####~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Hermione. Talk to me." Draco said softly, his hand still lingering on her face, his eyes looking through to her heart, seeing more than she wished to reveal.  
  
"I asked for what you could not give."  
  
"You never asked"  
  
"I knew what the answer would be."  
  
"Come back with me."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
" Why do you want me back?"  
  
"Hermione......."  
  
"My death, my problems, the way we ended. None of it was your fault. You bear no blame."  
  
"I know."  
  
"I am not your responsibility. Not any longer."  
  
"Hermione, I know. I want you to come back with me."  
  
"Why? To be the way we were? I need more than that. I need more than you could give." She tried to run from him, but he held her there, imprisoned between the pain of the present and the pain of the past. Torn between what was and what could have been.  
  
"I....."  
  
"Go back Draco, go back before it's too late."  
  
"No. If you won't go back, I will stay with you in this Dark silence, I will share your pain until eternity ends, until this rowan blooms again."  
  
"why?"  
  
"I love you Hermione, more than life, more than myself. You are my breath, my heart, my soul, and I would rather spend an eternity of pain with you than a life time of pleasure without you. Come back with me."  
  
With a cry of happiness Hermione wrapped her arms around Draco, relishing in the truth known too late, and for the first time in a thousand years, the rowan bloomed. The Darkness shattered, the silence broke, and the rowan's flower fell into Draco's hand.  
  
__________________________________________________________________  
  
Draco woke up as if from a dream, surrounded by the rabble and splintered pieces of wood. He glanced around, finding no sign of Hermione, the rowan, or the forest. His hopes plummeted, leaving him worse than he had been before his journey. So it was a dream, he thought. It was all just a dream. Hermione is still dead.  
  
Suddenly, Draco felt something in his hand. It was a flower, the rowan's bloom. Hope flared within him again, a fragile flame within his vast darkness. He ran out of his room heading for the hospital wing towards Hermione's body.  
  
He entered the room, ignoring the startled cry of Madame Pomfrey, ignoring Hermione's parents, weeping by her side. He stood beside her, hoping beyond hope for her to breathe, for her to give him a sign of life. She didn't stir.  
  
With a hoarse cry he gathered her body into his arms, rocking back and forth, loosing her for a second time. The flower that was in his hand dropped onto her lap, blending with her, surrounding her body with its fragile flame. Draco didn't notice. With every breath he took he felt his soul being torn apart, a darkness growing within his heart, the flame torn one thread at a time.  
  
Suddenly, a pair of arms circled his shoulders, and he heard his name whispered in his ear.  
  
"Draco"  
  
He looked up, finding himself looking into a pair of beautiful cinnamon eyes, his arms around the girl he loved: his breath, his heart, and his soul.  
  
"I love you" he said softly, as he bent down again, this time to claim a kiss from her soft lips. She made a muffled sound before relenting, sharing with him the joy of the moment. When he finally broke free, Hermione was smiling at him, her eyes telling him all that he needed to know.  
  
"I love you." She said softly  
  
"Never do this to me again."  
  
"What would you do if I did?" She murmured.  
  
"Follow you to the end of time. I'll make you mine, again, and again, and again."  
  
"And you? What of you?"  
  
"I'm yours, Hermione. Never doubt that. As long as I live, my heart, body, and soul belongs to you."  
  
Draco claimed another kiss, holding her as tight to him as possible, making sure that she was there, in his arms, receiving his love and giving it in return.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~##########~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Draco?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"I think my father's going to kill you very soon if you don't let me go."  
  
~~~The End ~~~  
  
Disclaimer: these characters do not belong to me, they belong to J.K. Rowling. I just own the plot. Oh.part of the dialogue was stolen from Elizabeth Lowell's Forbidden, so I should acknowledge her as well.  
  
First of all, so sorry that this chapter was so slow in the making. My term just began and I had a lot of catching up to do. How do you like the ending? I'm not that good with mushy lovy dovy scenes (which is why I have always avoided them and did depressing ones instead.), I hope this isn't that much of a disappointment. Thanks everyone for reading up until the end. I know it deviated quite a lot from the original plot, but I hope everyone liked it. (You better, I made it a Happy Ending on request !!) Please Read and review.  
  
By the way, I'm not sure whether I should write a sequel or not. I have a couple of plot lines in mind so since you guys are (most likely) going to read my next story, I though you should have a say.  
  
Choice A, obviously, would be for me to just write a sequel to this story. Since it is a sequel, it will have most of this story's characteristics, including depression and teenage problems. It will be about Draco and Hermione's last year at Hogwarts, Their problems with Harry, Ron, and the school as a whole, the Dark Lord's sinister plans, and Draco's second temptation to the dark side, blah blah blah  
  
Choice B would be for me to write another completely independent story. It will be a Draco/hermione, but will be predominantly more mushy and will have a lot less depressing parts. It will also be set in their last year at Hogwarts and will have a Soap Operaish type of plot. (Hermione, Ron, and Harry want to raise funds for (something, I don't know) and they get hired by two original characters to play matchmaker. The target of this match making scheme will be none other than Draco Malfoy, and obviously, the plan will go awry and Draco will set his sights on someone else. (guess who.))  
  
Well, please tell me what you think and remember to review this story! It is the last chapter after all. Thanks and good bye  
  
Romantic Fool 


	29. sequel

Please don't miss the sequel to this story -  
  
"Love Was Not Enough" found here at fanfiction.net. (Click on my name, and then find the story)  
  
Thanks you all for reading "I need you to love me." 


	30. Epilogue - A Message to Readers

Hi Everyone,

I just logged back into this account today (after an entire decade had passed). Firstly, I want to apologize for abandoning this story many moons ago. I had just gotten into college and was busy being a bit of a drama queen. I abandoned my writer self (horrible, I know). On top of that, the email address linked to this account died and I stopped getting updates.

I have now gotten back into writing (it was always in me, I was just running away from it). I moved away from fanfiction and started creating stories of my own. If you want to know more about that, you can check me out at .com. You can also contact me there.

But this message isn't about me, it's about everyone who messaged and reviewed. It means a lot to me that you took the time to make those comments. I was having a low moment (even now, being an author is still more a dream than a reality), and I was beginning to question if I was even a good writer at all. Reading all the reviews and comments about a story I wrote 10 years ago gave me a tremendous confidence boost, and the impact of that can't be measured in words.

Thank you all so much for following me on . I would never have become who I am without writing these stories 10 years ago. If there are any of you out there questioning if you should try your luck at becoming a writer one day, please make a go of it. I wasted a great deal of time trying to become something I didn't want to be, and only recently did I realize the simple truth that I should do what makes me happy.

Best,

Tara Quan (aka Romantic Fool)

P.S. My works on are considered part of the public domain. Translate, adapt, borrow from it as much as you'd like (though I'd appreciate it if you could credit me).

P.P.S. I actually still work 40 hrs/week + over time on top of trying to write the sequel to my first novella, so my fanfiction days are officially over.


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